I’m not going to dwell on him calling mebabyand how Ireally like how it sounds. I want him to say it again and again, but I push that down for now.
“I have a lot less to lose than you for calling out Ramon Vera, of all people.” He nods in agreement, and I pull away from him, taking in his perfect features. I lean in and kiss him, not caring that someone could open this door any second, risking our secret being revealed. He kisses me with such passion that it makes my heart flutter hard in my chest, as he shows me how much he craves me.
Can I love him outside of this closet, out from behind closed doors? Can I love him out in the open?
Holy shit. I love Dean Dixon, and I know he loves me. Not only has he told me, but he shows me over and over that he does. Every time he swipes away a tear, stands up for me, or is just there when I need him, that’s what love looks like. Not flowers and chocolates. Being there when it’s most important.
“Let’s get out of here,” Dean says after ending our kiss.
I nod and let him lead me out of the closet, going our separate ways. Heading toward a race that will determine both of our futures.
FIFTY-TWO
DEAN
Welcometo one of the fastest tracks on the stock car racing circuit. Today, a champion will be crowned and a spot in the Cup Series filled.
I’m waiting by my car on pit road, ready for opening ceremonies to start. My heart pounds in my chest as the nerves start to kick in. I never get nervous before a race, not since my rookie season when I had a full blown panic attack in the bathroom, where Chase found me. He had to talk me off of the floor and bring me back to pit road where Steve was looking for me. Chase has been my closest friend ever since.
I’ve been in a constant spiral about what could happen at the end of this race. Not just with my career, but between Regan and me. If I win and get into Cup, will she resent me? If she wins, will she leave me behind?
My mind wanders back to being in that closet with Regan after she stormed out of that conference. The way she looked at me after our kiss, I can’t explain it. I know for a fact that she wants the same things I do, feels the same way I do. She just needs to come to terms with it in her own time.
“Dixon!” The bite in the tone tells me exactly who it is. I hold back an eye roll before turning to face him.
“Haven’t you caused enough trouble around here?” I snip at Ian. Just the smug look on his face makes me want to punch him all over again.
“Just wanted to say good luck, you’re going to need it,” he says with a sneer, crossing his arms over his chest.
Yep, definitely wish I could punch him again.
“I could say the same thing for you. Starting in the rear of the field after wrecking in practice is such a bummer,” I toss back. “And the fact that even if you do win today, that Cup spot is as good as mine. Better luck the next time a spot opens.”
Ian shifts on his feet. He doesn’t like the reminder that even if he gets a championship, he loses out on the chance to be in Cup next season. I still think it’s bullshit that he could even get a title after what he did to Regan. Some part of me is glad that he can’t worm his way into Cup.
“It’s a long race, Dixon,” he replies through gritted teeth. “Anything can happen.” Desperation shows in his features, that he will do anything to win. I need to make sure that I know where he is at all times during this race. I’m not opposed to playing a little rough out on the track, but if he comes close to Regan, I swear he’ll end up in the care center, consequences be damned.
I take a step closer to him, reminding him of our height difference. “You’re right, anythingcanhappen.” I take another step so that we are almost chest to chest. “Let’s wait and see who crosses the finish line first, huh?” The whooshing of my heart is the only thing I can hear as Ian and I stare each other down, until a hand touches my chest and I hear her voice.
“Boys, boys. Let’s not get nasty before we even fire the engines,” Regan says, and my body instantly relaxes.
A chuffed laugh comes from Ian. “Letting your girlfriend fight your battle for you, I see.” I try to take another step toward him, but the pressure on my chest from Regan growsstronger, pushing me away. I let out a small growl as I let Regan pull me away, causing Ian to laugh even harder as he walks back to his own car and crew. Hearing him laugh like that makes what I ate for breakfast slosh around in my stomach, and I want to go back after him so badly.
“Don’t,” Regan says. “He’s not worth it. He’s just trying to get in your head.” Fuck. I know that’s exactly what he’s doing, but it doesn’t keep the urge to use his face as a punching bag again cease.
The announcement that opening ceremonies are about to begin comes over the PA system. Regan gives my arm a squeeze and returns to her own car.
This is going to be a long race.
Green flag drops, and I’m back in my zone. Forgetting about what happened with Ian before, my lingering thoughts about Regan and I are shoved to the furthest depths of my mind. All that matters now is winning this race.
I’m mid-pack and ten laps in. Regan takes second away from Drew Clarks, and is now already gaining on Taylor for the lead.
I’m doing my best to maneuver in traffic, but the handling isn’t where it should be, making it harder. The top ten are all in single file, and everyone after that is all two and three cars wide around this superspeedway. Luckily, this track allows for this kind of racing, though it can make the handling of these cars a nightmare with the air pressure pushing the cars around.
The first caution flag of the race waves when a wreck behind me takes out four cars, none of which are Hicks. I asked my spotter to keep me updated on his and Regan’s locations throughout the race today.
Steve comes over the radio to talk about our pit strategy for this stop. “Taking four tires and fuel. How’s the car feeling?”
