He looks at me through his eyelashes. No smirk—just boyish vulnerability he carries like a man. “I thought I could make you happy with gifts, throwing money around. I don’t want to change that, but I recognize there is more to a meaningful life than that. And you’re a part of that meaning for me.
“I have enough money to last a lifetime. I don’t need to make more, because it would never fill the void in a life without you. But I can use my skills to grow C.O.R.A. or similar programs. One cereal box at a time.”
And it’s like that last piece on the forgiveness puzzle clicks in. Because this might be the first time Xander Stone is not wearing a mask.
The moment grows heavy, and fuck, I need a break from the pent-up, loaded moments. “But then you won’t be an entitled rich asshole anymore,” I tease.
“I’ll still be an asshole.” He winks, leaning into our familiar banter.
I bite my lip, my grin splitting my face by now. “My asshole.”
He lets out a heavy sigh of relief. “Only yours.”
Chapter 37
Xander
Igrin like an idiot as I brush my teeth. When I undress. When I slip under the covers.
She wants to take it slowly, so she took me up on that chivalrous offer of staying in the guest house.
I don’t mind. I’ve been seeing her for two weeks now, and today gave me the first glimpse of hope.
I will gladly lie in the bed I made for myself, because at the end of all the fucked-up decisions, I think I’m still getting the girl. Not that I deserve her.
We spent the rest of the afternoon talking. As I was leaving, the weather shifted, and a storm began to stir.
As soon as I arrived, the skies split wide open. Beneath the steady roar of rain, the past two weeks replay in my head on an endless loop.
Her excitement about the book. How she still tucksher hair behind her ear even though it is held by a headband. Her lips on the rim of the glass, savoring the wine.
How she burped after the last slice of pizza. How she rubbed her belly after the first bite of bomboloni. How sweet that too-short kiss this afternoon tasted. How she smiled at me.
For the rest of my life, I want to be seen by her. It’s the most potent drug out there. To have a woman you love looking at you like you matter.
I don’t think sleep will come tonight, so I grab my phone and flip through the news. Giving up my shares at Merged didn’t hurt as much as I would have expected.
My heart wasn’t in it. Not only because it was entirely wrapped up in Cora. Or rather, in her absence.
She showed me there is more to life than making money. The way she took care of people around her, even if some of them didn’t deserve it.
Even her cynical skepticism opened my eyes more than any other experience.
Even if she never gave me a chance, service to others would be her legacy in my life. Life I would have wasted if the redhead temptress hadn’t crashed into it.
Dropping my phone, I stop the mindless scrolling. Ihaven’t been paying attention anyway. I sigh, her green eyes flickering in my mind.
A sharp bang against the door jolts me upright. What the hell? In this storm?
I take the stairs two at a time and peer through the front window—nothing but darkness stares back.
“Xander.” Another bang is accompanied by Cora’s voice.
I almost dislocate my shoulder yanking the door open. A flash of Cora sparkles in front of my eyes before I’m soaked wet, because she jumps at me, wrapping her arms and legs around me and crashing her mouth over mine.
Her lips taste like rain, and the sweetest memory. I stumble back and kick the door closed, pinning her against it.
I’m half sure this is a dream, but when her moan penetrates my mind, I pull away.
