My fingers curl around the wire fence.This is where Laird and I kissed for the first time.Too many memories rush in at once, and I can’t stop them.I don’t know if it’s the cold air or everything I’ve been holding in, but something breaks inside me.
Tears fall as I stare at the empty field.I don’t want to lose Laird.I’ve always depended on him too much.All I’ve ever wanted was to be with him.Why does it have to be so damn hard?
Life’s unpredictable.Every bit of happiness hides a shadow of sadness behind it, and the other way around.When I thought I finally had everything, the man who loved me and a career I could be proud of, it all somehow turned into a mess.
I wipe my tears, exhausted.I’ve been crying too much lately.My head feels like it’s about to explode from the pressure.I thought becoming a model would bring me closer to Laird.I was wrong.When I finally had him, I could lose him just as easily because of my career.
No, wait.My career’s not even steady anymore.I could get dropped any time.If it weren’t for Alan, I’d probably be done already.He brought me back, gave me chances, made me the dream girl I thought I wanted to be.
But the career Alan gave me is like a poison.It’s what’s ruining what I have with Laird.It’s always been a losing game.
I take a deep breath.Nothing’s going my way, but I try to pull myself together.I need to be stronger, like Mom.Now’s not the time to drown in useless sadness.I should just go back to the stand and not leave her alone for too long.
* * *
“Fenella!”
“Hey, sweetheart!”
The moms crowd around me the second I show up at the bazaar stand.One by one, they pull me in for hugs and plant little kisses on both cheeks.
They’re all Mom’s friends, women from the foundation, most of them widows but full of energy and gossip.They’ve got this tight bond, and I guess that’s why this whole fundraising bazaar was their idea in the first place.
“You ladies made your stand look amazing!”
“Oh my God, are these real Oscar de Ragetti shoes?”
“This bag!Wait, this dress would be perfect for a wedding!”
“Do you think it’ll even fit you?”They tease and laugh, their voices overlapping in cheerful chaos.
“Are these all real designer pieces?Are they yours?”one of them asks, blinking at me with curiosity that’s way too sharp to ignore.
“Uh, yeah.”I nod, giving her a faint smile.
“Jeez, I don’t know if I can even afford that.The originals must cost thousands.”
“You must be so proud to have a daughter who’s a famous model.”
“Where’ve you been hiding Fenella, huh?Look at her!She’s gorgeous!”
They giggle and chatter with that familiar mix of warmth and envy.None of them seem to have seen that cursed ad, thank God.
“Oh, please.I had to call her a bunch of times just to make her come home and help me with this stand,” Mom says with a laugh, though her cheeks go pink.
She looks happy.Proud, even.It’s rare to see her like this, and of course now that she finally approves of my career, I mess it all up.I can breathe a little easier knowing no one’s mentioned the condom commercial.If they had, they’d probably be side-eyeing me like I was contagious.
“Come on, don’t just stand there.You girls gotta try my eggnog,” Mom says, pulling out the paper cups she’s prepared.
“She should come home more often and share those fancy designer clothes she gets for free,” one of them says, smirking.
“Remember, this is for charity,” Mom cuts in quickly, earning a round of playful groans.
“No one here can afford that stuff anyway!”another laughs.
“So how much are you selling these for, Fenella?”They all turn to me, eyes wide, breaths held like they’re waiting for a big reveal.
Damn.I forgot to put the price tag for them or even use my brain to decide their worth.“Well, since it’s for the fundraiser, I guess a hundred bucks each?”I say, shrugging.
