“You’re so fucking beautiful.” His breath is labored as he fights the urge to fuck me. His eyes darken as he turns me to face him. “I will never get enough of you.”
“I love you, Ry.” He heaves a sigh of relief as he pulls me into his arms, his lips crashing down on mine in a fervent kiss. He doesn’t push it any further, hesitant, like he thinks I might break.
He stops before he can find release, insisting that he feed me, even when I’m rubbing against his erection.
“One step at a time.”
We spend the rest of the evening tangled in each other’s arms, talking for hours as we reconnect. I’ve missed this more than anything else—tofeelhis love in a tangible way.
I believe him when he says that he sees my scars as beautiful because of what they represent. That night was terrifying, but I was more scared of losing Ry than I was about losing my own life. I would do it a thousand times over. I can’t believe I put that in jeopardy by shutting him out.
For the first night in months, I fall asleep wrapped in his loving arms, drinking him in—his scent, the warmth of his skin, and the taut muscles of his chest as his heartbeat soothes the raw emotion swirling inside me.
I will never let him go again.
Tonight is my first night back in the kitchen at Rooftop, and I’m excited to be back at Venom, but nerves are wracking my entire body as I set foot in the lobby. The security guard gives me a small smile as I hand over my Venom card—Sleek black metal with a V emblazoned on the front.
“It’s lovely to see you again, Ms. Struthers. Welcome back.”
“Thank you.” With Ryder’s hand in mine, we head for the elevators.
“Breathe, baby girl. Everyone is excited to have you back. The kitchen isn’t the same without you.”
“I know this isn’t Dulip, but the last time I was in a kitchen with you was the night of the fire. I’m scared that I’ll freak out and embarrass myself.”
He cups my face in his hands, entreating me to look up at him. “PTSD isn’t something to be embarrassed about. We survived something pretty terrible. I’d be surprised if you weren’t a little apprehensive tonight.”
“You’ve been fine.”
“The first time I came here after that night, I was bricking it. You didn’t witness it but ask any of the staff. I was like a deer caught in the headlights at the smallest crack and pop of the burners.”
“Really?”
“I wouldn’t lie to you, Aspen. It took me a week to feel anywhere close to normal, and Venom is somewhere I feel at home. It was hard, so I know the coming days are going to be challenging for you, but I’m so fucking proud of you. You come to me if you feel overwhelmed.”
“Okay.”
“I’m just going to let you know, if I feel you need it, I will have you go down to our private room and regroup.”
I’m about to protest, but it dies on my lips. “Yes, Sir.”
“Good girl,” he says as he dips in and kisses the tip of my nose. “Now, get to work.”
He takes my hand in his as he leads me into the kitchen. My heart starts hammering in my chest, the sound of my pulse whooshing in my ear in a cacophony of terror. I’m frozen to the spot, the rapid rise and fall of my chest making me close to hyperventilating.
“I don’t think I can do this.” I grip his hand as if it were a lifeline in the choppy high seas of my turmoil.
“I’ve got you, baby girl. Slow your breathing and focus on the sound of my voice.” He quickly turns to the staff. “Everyone out. We need a minute.”
Without a word, they file out into the restaurant to give us some privacy, but I don’t think that’s going to help. Panic rises in my chest.
Ryder takes my hands in his, rubbing gentle circles with his thumbs. “Take a deep breath. You’re safe. This isn’t Dulip. John is behind bars. I’m here with you every step of the way.”
“I… I…” I can’t breathe.
“In… out… in… out. Eyes on me, Aspen.” My eyes snap to his as I attempt to block out the world around me. I know what I need, but I feel silly asking for it.
“Sir.” It’s all he needs to understand my current state.
