He grinned, unrepentant. "Even the..."
"Yes, Dorian!" she snapped, then added dryly, "And next time, you're the one trying it."
Dorian actually took a startled step back, as though she might be hiding butt plug in her handbag.
Rune burst out laughing, clutching her sides. "Relax," she managed between giggles. "You're safe for now."
He stared at her for a moment, an unfamiliar tenderness in his eyes as he gazed down at her beloved face. Under the low streetlight, her complexion seemed to glow, her long dark hair swayed gently in the cold breeze. Almost without meaning to, his hand lifted, brushing a loose strand behind her ear. She stilled, eyes flicking up to his, and for a moment, neither of them spoke.
She was still so slender, her pregnancy barely visible yet, but a thought struck him hard; Maybe this didn't have to be something to fear. He hadn't wanted children because his childhood had been a warzone of terror. He still didn't believe he should bring children into this world to suffer. But even when he was in denial, he knew Rune was special to him. With her... maybe it would be all right. Her parents were together. Her grandparents, too. They were close, a family that actually functioned and loved. Watching them was like glimpsing the life of another species entirely, one that had somehow understood something beyond toxic love and abuse. Maybe their children would be all right in a world like this.
The touch seemed to break an invisible spell that kept her still. Rune's laughter faded, her expression sobering as reality slid back into place. What was she doing? Standing here, laughing and talking about sex with him, the very man who had made her feel small for years. The one who had hurt her, humiliated her, broken her in ways she still hadn't fully pieced back together. Anger surging up to fill the space the warmth had left behind.
She stepped back abruptly from his touch, her eyes cooling to ice. "It's all fine talking about marriage and houses," she said, her voice cutting through the space between them, "but that doesn't change the fact that you were awful to me for years. I understand now that I had an unrealistic image of you and that's on me, but..."
Rune took a shaky breath, forcing herself to steady the tremor in her voice. "I need to be sensible about this," she said finally.
Dorian's eyes searched her face, but she pressed on before he could speak. "You knew I was in love with you for so long," she said, herwords soft but laced with accusation. "You knew and you used that. You usedme."
He looked down at her with a strange expression on his face. Not quite regret, but...
"Now suddenly you've grown a conscience and think you can make it all unicorns farting sparkly rainbows. You can’t rewrite our history. You can’t deny you kept me a dirty secret for five years."
She looked down at the pavement, then back up at him. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears, but her voice was like a blade. "It's just not good enough."
"Rune..."
"No." She shook her head, her voice rising dangerously high. "I don't want to marry you. I don't want to live with you. And as much as I'd like to, I can't deny my children their father." They'd reached the quiet lane that led to her parents' house. The glow of the porch light shimmered faintly in the distance. Rune looked toward it, the outline of safety, of everything steady and ordinary-everything she wanted for her children.
She turned back to him. "You need to think carefully about what you really want, Dorian. My babies deserve more than a part-time." Her lips thinned as the tears threatened. " I'll be watching you. I won’t let you hurt them like you hurt me. Over and over again."
Dorian nodded slowly, his face smoothing back into that familiar, expressionless mask. He shoved his hands deep into his coat pockets. "Fair enough," he said quietly. "I'm on probation, then. As long as you give me a chance. You won’t regret it. "
Rune's chin lifted, her composure brittle but intact. "Good night, Dorian."
He watched her walk away, her figure a slim shadow against the pale light of her parents' doorway, until she disappeared inside. Then he turned toward the dark street, exhaling into the cold night, alone with the quiet knowledge that he was in for the fight of his life. And he never started a war he wasn’t guaranteed to win.
Chapter thirty-two
Chapter 32
The next few weeks slid into an odd new routine, one Rune hadn't exactly signed up for but couldn't seem to stop either. It was like a juggernaut, out to demolish her every defence.
Every morning at six sharp, Dorian was on her parents' doorstep. Rune often came down to find him drinking coffee with her mother as if he'd lived there his entire life. Her mom would be chattering away while Dorian was a captive audience. The only thing missing was a notepad and a pen. One morning, she'd come down the stairs bleary-eyed to find him leaning against the counter, mug in hand, earnestly asking,"What do pregnant women eat in the mornings? Something with iron?"
Her mother, to Rune's growing horror, had begun answering him. She was rooting for him, just a little bit, but it was enough. To her dad, however, Dorian was still public enemy number one. Dorian took his barely concealed insults in his stride. He insisted on driving Rune to work, ignoring her protests that she was perfectly capable of walking. Every afternoon, he'd be waiting when she came out, usually with something to tempt her vanishing appetite.
Eleri's eyes had rounded the first time she saw the sleek black car idling at the curb. "Oh my God," she whispered. "He's here, isn't he?"
Rune groaned. "Why are you the queen of stating the obvious?"
They had gone back to being friends like they were back in school. Rune had desperately needed someone to confide in and though Eleriwas a gossip, she did know when to keep her mouth shut. ‘Dorian at the doorstep’, as Eleri liked to call him, had become a daily routine.
Through the window, she could see Dorian talking to Mr. Williams, the senior partner at the conveyancing office. Her boss looked utterly charmed, but the second Rune stepped into view, Dorian's focus locked on her.
His gaze swept over her with worry like she was about to summit Everest instead of sit behind a desk. His eyes roamed, taking in her blazer, the scarf, the cup of tea in her hand, as if assessing whether she was appropriately equipped for survival.
Eleri looked on in fascination as he start nagging while wearing his usual worried frown of disapproval the moment Rune reached him. "You didn't eat lunch, did you?"
