Rune hesitated, then let it out in a hurry, blurting "I'm pregnant."
Her grandparents exchanged a glance, something unspoken passing between them. Nana set her cup down.
"Alright, you need to tell us what happened, Rune, or your gramps and your da will be catching the next train to London."
"It's nothing," Rune said quickly. "He... I knew him from work. He's not worth it, trust me. We're better off alone."
The bitterness in her voice surprised even her. Nana's mouth softened. "Well, you should stay here for a bit. Take a walk and clear your lungs. London is full of smoke and pollution, love."
Rune managed a smile. Outside the kitchen window, she could see the sweep of the property, the long pasture stretching away to the south, the neat rows of fencing, the old stone barn with its weathered beams. Beyond that, more fields dotted with sheep, and the wind that rolled down off the mountains carrying the salt from the coast.
A beautiful sable stallion and a roan gelding gazed peacefully in a paddock. In a separate enclosure was Starlight, Runes’ old pony with her foal.
"Can I have a sugar cube, nan?" she asked.
She always felt lighter here.
And she thought, as she made her way to the old wishing well by the fields, maybe she could build her life again.
***
The bookkeeping job came through quicker than Rune expected. A local conveyancing firm on the high street needed someone to cover maternity leave, and the director had been an old friend of her Gramps. At the interview, she'd told them she was pregnant, half-expecting it to be a dealbreaker, but the elderly gentleman, Mr. Williams, had just waved a hand and said, "We'll manage fine, Rune. You'll do."
On her first morning, the office smelled faintly of coffee and printer toner. Waiting at the front desk was Eleri Hughes, formerly Eleri Parry, one of Rune's old school friends. She was now married to their old classmate Gareth and expecting their second child. Eleri still had the same quick smile and that habit of leaning forward when she spoke with her eyes wide, as if everything she said was a shared secret.
They did a quick tour of the office, Eleri introducing her to the two conveyancers, the receptionist, and the girl in the back who handled the archives.
"You've timed it well," Eleri said, lowering her voice conspiratorially. "Quiet patch at the moment. Gives you time to settle in before all the chaos in spring, yeah?"
On their tea break, Eleri wasted no time in getting personal. "So, is the dad in the picture?" she asked, not unkindly, but with the frank curiosity that came easily in small towns.
Rune sipped her tea. "No."
Eleri's brows went up but she nodded. "You're better off knowing that now. Listen, there's a bonfire party Saturday night, up at Dafydd'splace. You should come. A bit of music, good food to take your mind off things. Now how about apanad*."
Rune let herself be talked into both, not quite sure why. It would be nice to be with people who were happy to see her.
The night of the party was crisp and clear, the smell of woodsmoke curling through the air before she even reached the field. The bonfire blazed high, flames licking the cold sky. People stood in clusters, laughing, faces lit orange by the firelight.
She spotted Eleri near a trestle table laden with food: sausages rolls, baked potatoes wrapped in foil, chips in takeaway boxes, and mugs of cider. Eleri waved her over, pressing a glass of ginger ale into her hand.
Old friends came over for a hug and to tease her about becoming posh since she moved to London. That was when she saw him standing near the edge of the crowd, hands in the pockets of his pants. For a second, from the back, she thought of Crispin, Dorian's friend, but when he turned, the resemblance was gone.
"Rune, do you remember Kai? He was a couple of years ahead of us," Eleri said, appearing beside her. "He's working remotely for some big company in Belfast. Lives just over the hill."
She smiled up at him while he looked down at her with warm hazel eyes and a serious expression. They ended up in two folding chairs near the fire, ginger ale for her, beer for him, talking about old times, mutual acquaintances from school, the teachers who'd retired, the ones who'd gone prematurely grey thanks to them.
"You ever miss it?" he asked.
"What?"
"Being young enough to think you could conquer the world?"
She smiled faintly. "Sometimes. But I think I like knowing better."
The fire cracked, sparks spiralling up into the cold night. Somewhere behind them, someone started a song, and Rune realised she felt... almost content. Not quite, but close enough to remember what it felt like.
panad*: cuppa(welsh).
