But Christ, I can’t. She fits here. Fits in my arms. Fitsme.
Her breathing shifts as she makes this soft, sleepy sound I’m already addicted to. It’s a half sigh, half of a content little coo. It drags a smile out of me before I can stop it.
The change in my breathing makes her roll onto her back. Hair spilling over the pillow, her eyes flutter open. After a few blinks, she turns to me.
And I wait.
I wait to see the horror in her eyes. That she slept with an assassin. One she saw kill a man. That we took things too far. That I was too impatient and pushed against her will like that bastard Kosta.
When a soft smile reaches her eyes, there’s no regret. Not even a shadow of it.
She just…beams.
And I know.
I’m done pretending. No more fake boyfriend. This is now real, and she is mine.
She figured out she was perfect for me before I did,slipped straight through my defenses without even trying.
Masterfully.
Now all I can do is catch up. Adjustments need to be made to my life, and I’m looking forward to being less lonely. Aching for the kind of happiness my brother and cousins have.
I kiss her shoulder. “Morning, love.”
“Hi,” she whispers.
All I want to do is freeze this moment. Stay like this, our bodies tangled in a soft, afterglow of all the love we made last night.
My ugly world hasn’t crept back in yet, and I want to keep it out. Just for a little longer.
But Fallon stretches, yawns, and says, “We have so much to do today.”
I groan at the cracked spell, but I’ve been feeding off her energy. I respect all her hard work. Her passion is to bring life and beauty into an ugly world.
“Hey,” I say, pulling her back next to me. “You okay? About last night.”
She blinks and breathes.
Oh no.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” She leans in and kisses me. “We’re in a relationship. This was the natural next step.”
Her moments of complete clarity floor me. Like when she’s crisp and not fanciful and dreamy. But I don’t mind her imaginative side. I’m used to how she talks to her plants now. I’ve seen mates talk to their dogs and then make up voices like the dogs are talking back.
No one thinksthat’sweird.
We all need a way to get through the day. I hope I can be the emotional anchor Fallon needs. That she can come to me without a plant tribunal every time she spirals. I have to watch her moods, and I’m okay with that. Andthat she will be there for me in return. To let me hold her after a kill until I turn human again, to let me work off the aggression with her in my bed. To fill the silence when my head is screaming, but also let the quiet moments do their thing, because sometimes we don’t need words. Just each other’s breathing.
I went into this with my eyes wide open. I know what I’m getting and what I’m getting myself into.
And fuck, I can’t wait to see what happens next.
While I’m in my head, Fallon charges straight through to drill sergeant, reminding me of the upcoming events.
Here we go…
Operation Lobby Decorating Committee:
