I made my way to the bar and gripped the edge of the counter. The bartender looked at me expectantly.
“Do you have something besides Queen’s Blush?” I needed something stronger. Something that might actually numb the self-loathing clawing at my chest.
The bartender pulled out a dark ornate bottle covered with chains. “How about some Black Smoke?”
“Pour me a glass.”
The bartender hesitated. “Sir, this is usually just a shot. It’s too powerful for?—“
“I said pour me a glass.”
He stared at me for a moment, then shrugged. “Your funeral.”
He poured the dark amber liquid into a tumbler. I grabbed it before he even finished and downed half of it in one swallow.
It burned like liquid fire, scorching a path down my throat and settling in my gut like molten lead.
Good. Maybe it would burn away the image of Alice’s shattered face.
“Give me another.”
“Sir, I’m not sure that’s?—”
I grabbed his shirt and yanked him halfway over the counter, our faces inches apart. “I said another.”
His eyes went wide. He nodded quickly, hands trembling as I released him. The bottle clinked against the glass as he poured.
“Darius, love? What are you doing?”
My shoulders tensed. I downed the rest of the glass before turning, a smile plastered on my face. I held up my empty glass. “Celebrating our new beginning.”
Her gaze focused on the bottle of Black Smoke. She sauntered over to me, her hips swaying, her eyes glittering with something possessive.
“Drinking the hard stuff?” She plucked the glass from my hand. “That will put you in a stupor. And I want you to remember everything tonight.”
The implication in her voice made my skin crawl. There was no way I could sleep with this woman. The only woman I wanted was in the dungeon—broken because of me. The thought was a knife to the chest. I'd done this to her. Shattered her in front of the entire court. And now she was alone in the dark, believing every lie I'd told.
She stretched out her hand. “Let’s dance.”
I stared at her fingers—elegant, deadly—and forced myself to take them.
I led her to the middle of the floor. The musicians struck up a waltz immediately, as if they’d been waiting for her command. Because of course they had.
I twirled Alanna around, her black-and-crimson gown fanning out like blood on water. Other couples soon joined us, spinning and laughing, oblivious.
But all I could see was Alice’s face. The tears streaming down her cheeks. The way her shoulders had crumpled. The light dying in her eyes as my words destroyed her.
I was dancing with a monster while the woman I loved rotted in chains below us.
And there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.
Every time the musicians stopped, I edged away from Alanna and snuck another glass of Black Smoke. Then another. And another.
My vision grew blurry. The room tilted. I stepped on Alanna’s toes mid-waltz.
“Darius, you’re drunk.”
“Drunk with happiness,” I slurred, forcing a sloppy grin.
