“I’ve seen the results, I mean.” He waves the embarrassment away with the swish of his hand, addressing the others. “These two are pushing the boundaries of science, I’m telling you.”
“These two?” asks the sixth August. “So they’re working together?”
“You could say that.” Asshole August chuckles.
“They’reexperimentingtogether?” asks the one with the gun on my August.
Breaking into a full cackle, Asshole August sits on the ground, enjoying himself way too much, and says nothing else.
“We, um…” August looks at me like I might be able to help.
I guess there’s nothing else for it… “We’re a sex accelerator.”
There’s a collective chasm of silence so deep I think it might permanently swallow me.
“I was going to say,” my August breaks in, “we can open portals but not close them.”
“No, wait,” says Navy Coat. “Go back to the other thing.”
“Sex accelerator,” Asshole August laughs out, a huge smirk on his dumb face. The bastard.
“You’refucking?” the August with the gun on my August shouts, the sound ricocheting off the buildings so loud that if anyone but Augusts were awake to hear it, I might actually be embarrassed.
“It’s a bit more than that,” I shout back.
“Wait, you’retogether?” the sixth August cries.
“Yes!” I yell at him too. “Is that really so strange, five hundred years in the future?”
“That is completely bizarre,” declares the August with the gun on my August.
“Is that like… incest?” asks Navy Coat, wincing in a wholly unnecessary way.
“Sounds more like masturbation,” muses August Sixth.
“Masturbation on a really grand scale,” Asshole August interjects.
“Jesus Christ.” I smash a hand over my face, dragging it down slowly. “Okay, enough. Enough about our sex life.”
“Sounds like it’s your sex life that’s brought us all together,” August Sixth says. “So, I think maybe we all need to hear more about your sex life.”
“It’s fantastic,” August grins. And fuck, he’s hot with a gun.
“No, not that bit,” August Sixth breathes out tolerantly. Then loudly adds, “How are you a sex accelerator?”
“We create friction,” my August says proudly.
So damn cute.
“I think I’m beginning to figure out which one is the physicist,” quips Navy Coat.
My August glares at him.
I glare at him.
Asshole August’s chin raises suddenly, catching my eye. He’s scanning the group, and for the first time since he arrived, there’s something oddly…calculatingabout him. Like he’s putting two and two together, realising in full that they have no way to figure out who’s who if we all keep our mouths shut.
The guy came to shoot me then kill himself. One-way mission bent on my destruction. I guess I can’t be surprised that he would?—
