“And it was about Zane?”
“Yes.”
Sienna gives her a hard stare, her exhausted brain trying to understand what she is hearing. “You don’t think she wrote ‘Faded Denim,’ do you?”
Claudia shrugs. “Maybe. I’m telling you this because I don’t want Ivy to be used by her father. Someday, some music journalist might figure it all out and Zane’s legacy will include being a thief. I’d hate like hell for her to know he didn’t care enough about his own daughter to let her get the credit for her work.”
Blowing out a long sigh, Sienna mutters, “Well, shit. Are you going to go after him for your work?”
She shakes her head. “No. I’d like to leave the door open for him to have a relationship with his son, and that would pretty much close it permanently.”
“That’s very mature of you.”
“Thank you. I’m going to do my best to be someone Elliott can look up to.”
Sienna takes her hand and squeezes it. “You already are.” After she lets go, she says, “So? What are you going to do from here?”
“I have no idea. Most likely Full Moon will drop me now that the world knows I’m a harlot. And a liar. So, my solo career will be over just as it’s getting started. But I’d rather give up my dream than lie to my son for his entire life. He deserves to know the truth about who he is.”
Sienna sits quietly beside her for a full minute before she answers. She could very easily leave it at that. Let Claudia eat the rotten fruits of her own labor. After all, doesn’t she deserve it? Claudia’s future should be nothing toher. But she can’t do it. Claudia is as much a victim of Zane as she was. “You’re not going to get dropped.”
Claudia chews her bottom lip for a second. “How do you know?”
“Because I won’t let that happen.”
THE MORNING AFTER THE CONCERT
“Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.” ~ Henry David Thoreau
MARCH 23, 1997
LAS VEGAS
SIENNA
Sienna sits at the black dining table in her suite at the Mirage. It’s late morning, but you’d never know it because whoever designed the blackout blinds for the hotel did a much better job than the person who designed hers. She should be fast asleep in the king-sized bed with Ivy, but she’s wide awake. She sips some tea and stares into the bedroom where Parker, Zane, and Poppy are sleeping. The room has two queen beds. Parker is in one, and Zane and Poppy are in the one she can see from the door. After Poppy was released from the hospital, Zane asked if he could spend the night with them. He quickly showered, threw on some sweats and a T-shirt, then came to their room.
He and Sienna crawled into bed with their little girl, needing to have her close, and Sienna knew Zane would misinterpret what was happening. He’d be certain that they were going to get back together, having had a brush with tragedy. Because tragedy—and near misses with it—puts life into the sharpest of focus, shining a spotlight on what ‘truly matters.’ Family, health, love. But the focus blurs and fades all too quickly, replaced by matters of the ego. Pride, insecurity, self-centered pursuits.
More than that, what happened hadn’t changed anything. Zane hadn’t been magically transformed into someone she could trust. He wasn’t suddenly a good partner who would put the needs of his family ahead of his own. And now she knew it had all been a lie—likely even the song he used to make her fall madly and completely in love with him. He used her to prop up his ego, just like he used Claudia for her work, and Angela too. She knew in her heart Claudia was right. Part of her had probably known all along that the long dry spell had a logical reason behind it. He’d been a liar from the start. A cheater. A selfish man who lived only for himself.
And Sienna had a much better life ahead of her without him—one in which she played the starring role, instead of the supporting character all the time. She was barely starting to trust her own capabilities for the first time since she was a child. She wasn’t about to abandon herself again for a man who would only disappoint her.
So, she would do the kind thing and tell him the truth as soon as possible. It would be terrifying—to get those first few words out.It’s over. But she would manage to say them. And they would cry, and he would plead and make all sorts of declarations that he would mean today with his whole heart, but would never live up to in the end.
He would get angry and tell her it wasn’t fair and say he deserved another chance. He wasgrieving, after all. He would say her timing was cruel—right at the exact moment when The Vows were breaking up. He might even accuse her of ending itbecausehe was about to lose the band and wouldn’t be a world-renowned rocker anymore. She wouldlet him say those things. Then she would tell him he was wrong, and that she was ending it for her own sanity because staying with someone who wasn’t going to change made her feel insane. Loving someone shouldn’t hurt like this, shouldn’t make you feel small. And he made her feel small. Weak. Insignificant. When in fact, the opposite was true. She’d learned that about herself since she told him to leave, and she couldn’t go back to not knowing her strength and potential.
When it was over and she was back home, Sienna would grieve the end of a beautiful era in her life. She would grieve the future she thought lay in store for them, but at the same time, she would know that her version of it was a fantasy, just like Zane himself. The reality was something far more disappointing.
The kids would be heartbroken, but with any luck, she’d be showing them to stand up for themselves. She’d be teaching the girls not to build their lives around a man, but to find a man with whom they could build a life. Someone who would give them space to shine on their own. Someone who would encourage them and see them and love them more than they loved themselves. Someone faithful.
Standing up, she makes her way to the doorway of the bedroom as quietly as she can, then stands and watches Poppy and Zane sleep. The sight of it causes her heart to squeeze so hard that she feels a horrible ache in her chest. Zane is on his back with their little girl curled up next to him, her head on his chest. Safe and warm and loved. Tears spring to her eyes. She doesn’t bother to wipe them away but lets them continue on right down her neck and into her shirt.
He stirs and lifts his head, then glances to his right and sees that Sienna’s not in bed. When he spots her, he smiles,and gently eases Poppy back onto her pillow. Then he slowly gets out of bed and makes his way over to her.
When he reaches her, he narrows his eyes. “What’s wrong?”
Sienna’s heart races, and her stomach turns to stone. “I have to tell you something.”
