“Let’s eat and we can keep talking.”
A few minutes later, we’re sitting on the lounge chairs with our plates on our laps, under the light of the moon and the flickering of the candles. The only sounds are those of the waves and the occasional call of a bird. Paige is explaining to me the importance of having an objective for any ad campaign, whether it’s to gain new clients or to get old ones back. I listen, wondering if maybe, just maybe, she might be happy to start her own agency in San Felipe, where she could help people like me. It wouldn’t be the fast-paced, glamorous lifestyle she’s got now working with celebrities and huge corporations with nine-figure budgets, but maybe it would be enough.
When she finishes talking, she says, “Here I’ve been going on and on and I haven’t even touched my food. I’m probably boring you to death.”
“Not at all. I love hearing you talk about your work. You’re a wealth of knowledge.”
“I better be after so many years working with the world’s biggest clients,” she answers, lifting a forkful of rice to her mouth.
“Ever think of taking that knowledge and applying it on a smaller scale? Working with regular people who have big dreams?”
She shrugs. “Not really. There’s no money in it.”
I nod as though that makes perfect sense, which it does. It also feels like a kick to the junk because here I am, trying to test the waters, and it turns out they’re cold. What started out as me trying to make her feel better somehowmorphed into me trying to see if we might have a future together. The truth is, the longer we’re together, the more terrified I am that someday soon we’ll be found, and we’ll have to go back to our real lives. It’s that knowledge that has propelled things between us at a fast and furious rate—the fact that it could all be over any moment. It makes us both desperate to make the most of every second, because we both know in the real world, we don’t make sense. But out here, we’re perfect together. And the more I think about a future together when all of this is over, the more I want it to be possible, even though I know it’s too much to hope for. She’s not going to change her five-year plan and I’m not going to pick up everything and move to New York.
We’re both quiet while she finishes eating. Paige stacks her plate on mine on the side table, then says, “You look deep in thought.”
I give her a small smile, knowing I absolutely can’t tell her what’s really on my mind. But then, I hear myself say, “I was just thinking that I might not mind if we never got rescued.”
Paige grins for a second, then says, “Eventually, we’ll run out of vodka and pancake mix.”
I stare at her, my smile fading. “I don’t need either of those things to be happy.”
She swallows hard, then says, “What do you need?”
My heart pounds in my chest, and my palms feel suddenly clammy, but I force the words out of my mouth. “I’m looking at her.”
“Really?” she whispers, biting her bottom lip.
“Really. Come here.” She stands and I pull her onto my lap, and we kiss and hold each other for a long time. “I don’t know what happened to me, but for the first time inmy life, I understand what people mean when they say they can’t live without someone.”
“But you were married,” she says. “You must have felt like this before.”
I shake my head. “No. Not even for a minute. She and I wouldn’t have lasted a day out here without wanting to kill each other. But with you, this is … enough. I don’t know how you feel, Paige, but…” I bring my face to hers again and kiss her some more. “If we were stuck here forever, I know I’d be okay with it.”
“I feel the same way,” Paige whispers, cupping my cheeks in her hands. “I’ve never had anything feel this right before. Nothing.”
“This is crazy, isn’t it?” I ask, brushing my lips against hers. “If we’re not careful, I’m going to end up messing up your entire five-year plan.”
“Right now, I don’t even know who that woman with the plan was.” She closes her eyes and kisses me, wrapping her arms around my neck.
I stand and carry her into the house, and take her to bed, not wanting to think about the future or ask the what-ifs. Instead, I’m intent on showing her how I feel. I’m intent on making her forget that New York even exists.
We make love until the sun starts to come up, unable to stop ourselves until we’re both beyond exhaustion. She drops off to sleep with our naked bodies intertwined, and I watch her, my heart bursting. I wait until her breathing grows steady, then whisper, “I’m in love with you.”
And it’s true. I am one-hundred-percent all in. Which means I’m one-hundred-percent going to go bust when this is over.
25
We Should Probably Get Dressed Now…
Paige
Text to Vivian(that she won’t get until I’m rescued):
He loves me! He said it last night when we were drifting off to sleep. (Well, actually it was this morning because we were up all night getting lucky.) He thought I was asleep, and he whispered that he was in love with me. Oh, Vivian, I don’t know what to do. I’m in deep. So deep. And as badly as I want to see you and let you know I’m alive, I’m also terrified of this ending. There has never been a man like him for me, and there never will be again. I can’t even begin to explain how happy he makes me. It’s just a whole new level of being alive. Miss you. Love you.
Text to Paigefrom Vivian
