I wake up confused as to where I am for a split second. I’m looking into Kingston’s face; his jaw is slack, and the tension is gone from his eyebrows as he sleeps. I move slightly and can feel their dicks still inside me, and I smile at the thought that we fucked till we passed out. I try to wriggle out of Kingston's grip, and they both groan as they slide out. Kingston relaxes, and I sit up.
“You okay?” Devon grumbles.
“Yeah, just going to the bathroom, and I need a drink.”
“I’ll get you one.”
He moves to leave, and I shake my head. “No, it's fine, I need to stretch my legs.
“Well, we’ve stretched everything else for you, but I can’t help you there.”
I playfully shove him and wish things could be different. Maybe they would help me. Maybe they wouldkill me, who knows, but at the end of the day, I need to stay on target. I use the bathroom and head to the kitchen. I grab what I need and head back upstairs. When I step into the room, they’re both sleeping, and I lean over them. I pull the knives from behind my back and slam them simultaneously into the side of each one’s neck before jumping back out of the way. Their eyes fly wide as they gasp for a few seconds, and Devon grabs for his neck and tries to get out of bed but just falls to the floor before they both bleed out. I check for a pulse, and they’re gone.
I head to the bathroom and shower. I feel his arms wrap around me, and I smile.
“I thought you’d left me?”
His voice is a breath through the water. “Never.”
I savour the feeling of his closeness in case I can’t feel it again; there’s longer between spells of clarity, and I don’t want to let go just yet. When I feel him slip away, I sigh. I rummage through their drawers and grab some sweats. I don’t bother covering the evidence. What’s the point? I’m already dead, but I have a new lease on death now. I feel rejuvenated.
“Thanks for the epic fuck, boys. We really could have been great together.”
I search their rooms and find their safe. I use the knife to hack Devon's thumb off and let myself in. I empty it of everything except their real identities, tossing them on the bed with the blood and bodies, and I stalk downstairs and raid the fridge. I cook a massive breakfast. God only knows when I’ll eat again, and I head out the door swinging their car keys around my finger and whistling to myself. The more of TheCollective I eradicate, the better I feel, and right now, I have work to do.
I drive to my next target. There’s nothing to go back to the safe house for yet. I’ve got guns and knives from the boys, I’ve got cash, and I’ve got a couple of changes of clothes. The laptop is stashed safe, and I can do what I need on my phone for now. The car at the strip club isn’t even mine.
It’s one I stole then disconnected the battery once I arrived, so I drive to the docks. My next mark is in Brazil, and I’m going to have to get creative.
I slip in and out of the shadows and slip onto the boat with the cargo. Once we’re moving, I slip out of the cargo hold and join the rest of the patrons milling around sunbathing, shopping, and eating until it’s time to dock. Then I slip back into the cargo hold. I don’t have documentation. Well, that’s a lie. I do, but I don’t want to get flagged using it unless I have no other option. Father can’t know where I am, not yet anyway.
When I arrived in Brazil, I knew two of them worked closely together sometimes, so I set up a job and even went as far as supplying them with transport. I watched them climb into the vehicle before I hit the detonator and kaboom, bye, bye, motherfucker.
“Next.”His embrace engulfs every cell of my being, and I long forhim to hold on for a moment longer before he’s gone again.
I find a small hotel on the outskirts of the next town and decide I should sleep if I can. I can’t remember the last time I properly slept. Well, I can. It was wrapped tightly between two bodies when I was all sexed out. I sigh. I can’t see that happening for a long while. I drag the dresser in front of the door, and I crawl into bed. I’m exhausted emotionally, physically, psychologically. I’m hearing him less, and I try to hold on where I can, but what happens when I lose him all over again? But most of all, I just want this to all be over. I want to be with them both, permanently.
I manage to get a few hours of broken sleep, but I suppose it’s better than nothing. My mind is filled with them. I can’t turn it off, the look on Xav’s face when Father slit his throat, the look on Jacob’s face when I pushed him onto the plane and shut the door, and the emptiness I now feel now they’re both gone. I step into the shower and hold myself, trying to remember what it felt like when Xav slid in behind me and held me so tight like he was trying to put me back together.
“I’m still here, Vic. Just hold on. It’s almost over. We’re waiting for you.”
I stutter a breath as I try to hang on to his voice, to them, and I try to shake myself out of this funk I keep slipping into.
Father’svoice rings through my mind. “Emotions will get you killed; lose them, you’re behaving like a child.”
I don’t know what age I was then, as I don’t actually know what age I am now, but I do know I was a child. He used to beat me till I stopped crying, till the numbness washed over me, and once I was no longer whimpering and sniffling, he would tell me how good I was. Xav would be there to wrap me in his arms and hold me together so I didn’t break, but my fractured heart and my fractured soul are cracking worse than before, splitting till the core is visible and with no one left to hold me back together. Lord, have mercy on us all.
I slip onto the bed and pull out my phone. I check the camera feeds that are looking after the laptop. I make a backup and check the feeds watching that, too. I also have a copy hidden and log in to Xav’s files, checking everything’s still where it should be.
“Vic, breathe. You know what to do. You’ve got this.”
Everything’s still on track. If I don’t log in once every forty-eight hours, then it will dump the information everywhere, and I can’t have that happen just yet. I’m not ready.
I’m back in the UK at the safe house. It’s right under Father’s nose, not far from his main base of operations, which is an underground bunker under the military base. Everything is run from there, even the other factions. I’m surprised he hasn’t been here, to thesafe house. I thought they knew we were here when they followed Xav, but clearly not, so I hunkered down a little and watched their network.
They’re scrambling. They know something’s coming for them, but it looks like Father has neglected to tell anyone I’m still alive. I’m pretty sure he’s figured it out by now. So how very fucking foolish of you, old man. There are two of the assassins left, but Father has called them onto his security detail, which has made what’s left of my life so much easier.
I slide between the sheets, and there’s the faintest smell of him left on them. I wrap myself up in them and let myself dream of seeing them both again. I know they’re waiting for me; Xav told me as much. I just need to make it back to them. And once I’ve burnt his world down around him, I know that’s where they’ll be waiting for me.
