He nods.
“Johnathon is a very, very sore loser, David.” He stiffens. “Don’t worry, I’m not here to hurt you. well, technically, I am, but if you listen and do as I say, it won’t come to that.” I give him a tight-lipped smile.
“The organisation Johnathon’s grandfather is part of is a group of assassins, and a hit has been put out on you. You have two options: you either do everything I say, or you die. There is no third option, David.”
He swallows hard, blinks and nods his head rapidly.
“You may talk freely now, David.”
“I don’t understand a hit. Die?”
“Yes, David, they have sent someone to kill you. It’s your lucky day, as that someone is me.”
“H-h-how does that m-make me lucky?” He pushes back from the desk. “Y-your here to kill me?”
“Not exactly.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean? What the…?”
“David, please take a seat. I don’t have all day, and we have a lot to get through, so please stay calm and listen to me.” I pinch the bridge of my nose and sigh. It's far easier to kill people than it is to reason with them. Xav really should do this bit, and the only reason I do it is because I can physically change the most, so I’m unrecognisable. “David, yes, I have been hired to kill you.” He gasps, and I hold my finger up. “I’m offering you a way out. You need to listen to me, David. I can offer you a fresh start, a way out. You’re a good guy, David, and I don’t want to kill you, but I will if you force my hand.”
I reach into my bag, and he flinches. I toss a large manilla envelope on the desk. And nudge it towards him. He reaches out with shaky hands like it’s going to be the thing that kills him, and he pulls out the stack of papers. There’s a new identity, birth certificate, driving licence, passport, and a bank account with enough money to live normally, he’s not going to be rich, and if he blows it all, he’s fucked, but there’s enough for a fresh start. There’s a plane ticket that leaves in three hours. We’ll be cutting it fine, but it’s the best we can offer.
“You want me to run away?”
“Or die!”
“It doesn’t seem like I have much choice. What about my life?”
“David, your parents are dead, you never married, and you don’t have kids. I will rehome your fucking cactus, but you don’t really have a life to worry about, and if you stay, it won’t be a problem, ya get me?”
He sighs, and his eyes well up. “What do I have to do?”
“We have to make it look like I killed you. Do you have a shower here?”
He nods. I pull out the jar of blood, and he gags. “Is that real blood?”
I nod, and he gags again. “Right, slump over the desk. I’m gonna cover you in this shit. You need to look through me vacantly and stare off into the distance. That’s it. Slacken your jaw a little. Now, breathe out and relax. He blows out a breath, and while I snap the pictures, he lies there.
“Nice, that’s it, relax a little more, breathe out and… we’re good. Okay, now shower and put those on.” I toss him a bin liner full of clothes. “Add everything you’re wearing in the bin liner.” I sort through his drawers and find nothing of interest. When he comes out, I give him the once over. “I need the ring and the watch.”
“What? No! They’re all I have left of my parents.”
“And they’re also fucking traceable… to you.” I clap my hands at him, and he complies. I toss the jewellery onto the table, and I pull another bag out of my bag, and when he doubles over to be sick, I step away. As he straightens up, I punch him in the side of the mouth, and he yells out and grabs his face, spitting a tooth into his hand.
“Thank you.”
I take it from him, toss it on the table with the bag of flesh, and set fire to it.
“Stay behind me, here.” I toss him a baseball cap, “No matter what, keep your eyes trained on the floor, got it?” He nods. “When we get to the car, climb in the back seat, lay down, and stay down. There’s a blanket in there, so pull it over you, okay?” He nods, and we head out.
I don’t relax till he’s on the plane, and he’s no longer my issue. I’ve sent all the information to Xav, and he’s cleaned up security footage and deleted any trace of us. But it’s also been added to our ‘see, were not totally terrible humans’ file. Yes, we kill people. No, we don’t kill innocent people. Since we started on this mission, we have saved hundreds of people, and that’s got to account for something in the grand scheme of things, right? I mean, I ain’t getting into heaven, not by a long shot, but maybe my own place in hell, a little fancy place, maybe with a balcony, just something I can call my own. Is that too much to ask?
I head home feeling better about things, lighter. I always feel good after helping someone, but tomorrow’s another day.
Xav
Chapter XVIII
