I turn my attention back to the road and allow myself a moment to take in what he is seeing.
And it doesn’t take me long to realize it isn’t what he sees. It’s what he feels.
Quiet.
Peace.
A tranquility that is hard to come by in the day to day. Birds sing in the cover of the trees, high in the branches that curl and reach and grow. The wind adds to their music, adding a whistle and a hum that sweeps through the woods to tease at the loose strands of my hair. And while I’m sure the road leads somewhere, it seems endless, with bends and turns you can’t see around.
“When I need a moment, just a minute to think, I take this road. It puts it back into perspective.”
I nod. “It’s so quiet.”
“Peaceful,” He agrees. “We’ll take this road when we head out in a couple of days. Just up there is an opening we’ll drive the cattle through, and it opens up at the base of the mountain.”
“We?”
He cuts his eyes to me. “You think I’ll leave you on my ranch unattended?” His grin stops my heartin my chest. “Think again, Hellion, I’m sure I’ll either return to it on fire or you would have turned half the animals against me.”
I gasp in mock horror. “I’m offended.”
“Am I wrong?”
I flutter my lashes, “Yes, and it isn’t my fault your animals like me more than you. It’s the feminine touch, obviously.”
His laugh shakes his shoulders, his smile lifting his eyes, “Obviously.”
“I’ll ride Apollo?” I press, following his lead as he steers Honey around to head back the way we came.
“I wanted to check what he would be like with you first, hence why we are here, but yes, you’ll take him. It’ll be good for him, and you.”
“And if he didn’t behave?”
“I have another horse you would have taken,” He shrugs, “But I knew you two would be good. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen Apollo like he is with you.”
“Why?” I ask.
“He’s been grieving.” Knox turns his face to me, “And since then he hasn’t been half the horse he once was. I see his spirit returning with you.”
I don’t know why, but hot tears prick at my eyes. “Who was he grieving?”
“My father.” He gives a subtle squeeze of his legs to get Honey moving, but I can’t move from the spot. Apollo belonged to his father. The father my own father destroyed.
And his horse…
My heart drops down into my stomach.
Apollo throws his head back, his restlessness urging me to follow, but I hang back, keeping the distance between us.
I understand loss. I’ve felt it, in different forms, through death, through betrayal, but this… I can’t imagine how this feels.
Guilt isn’t something I am used to.
I don’t feel guilty; we do what we do because it serves a purpose. The world is a cruel place; you eat or get eaten or so I was taught.
But I neversaw.
I didn’t see what those actions caused, the consequences that should have been ours to feel and yet were everyone else’s.
