I open my mouth to demand answers, but he begins to walk away, “Let’s go, Savannah, the service is about to begin.”
Chapter Forty-five
“When were you going to tell me?” Dean barges into my kitchen, demanding an answer.
I place my coffee mug down, narrowing my eyes at him. My skin is tight with dried sweat, clothes still damp with an ache in my muscles that won’t leave for quite some time. After the service was over, I took Savannah home and I left before she could ask more questions.
Is she remembering?
“Tell you what, brother?” I ask.
His jaw twitches as he grinds his teeth, “That you’ve been fuckingSavannah.”
My heart drops into my stomach, nausea churning, “The fuck did you just say?”
“You heard me.”
“I heard you,” I growl, “Just not sure you meant to say it.”
Dean laughs and then shakes his head, “It all makes sense now.”
My hand curls tightly around the mug but I remain silent, watching my brother pace the length of the kitchen.
“You have been fucking torturing yourself. I thought it was the past; I thought it was the nightmare of our childhood, but it isn’t, is it?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Stop fucking lying!” He roars, “Stop it!”
Silence falls. A clock ticks behind me, like the sound of a death toll.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
“You’re in love with her and it’s killing you.” Dean lets out a long, heavy breath.
“How did you find out?”
What’s the point in denying it? This is my brother weare talking about, he’s a fucking genius, he sees shit, knows shit and he wouldn’t come here without proof. He knows and there’s no way to deny it.
“I saw the coverage of that singers service today,” He says, “Watched you with her and sure, you were protecting her, but I knew it was more than that.”
I remain quiet as I watch him.
“So, I pulled up some footage from the security system you had me install. Funny thing is, Kill, I had suspicions already, even before the accident but I thought there’s no way you’d fall in fucking love with our best friend’s little sister and not fucking tell me.”
“What was I supposed to say?” I swallow.
“I don’t know!” He yells, “Anything!? Something!?”
“It’s wrong.” Sorrow has been a constant weight on my heart since I let Savannah leave that night. The intensity of the sadness has no limits, some days, it easier to breathe but most days it feels like I cannot get enough oxygen into my lungs. Living without her is excruciating, a poison that takes its time to kill.
Dean shakes his head, “No, what’s wrong is you keeping it a fucking secret.”
“Bast will fucking kill me if he finds out.”
