“If you’re holding her, you’re less likely to storm off,” She smiles at me triumphantly, “Or lock me out.”
“That’s cheating,” I grumble, gently rocking the baby even though she’s still sound asleep, “I can’t believeyou’d use your daughter like that.”
Willow scoffs “I’ll use whatever means necessary to get you to talk to me, Savannah, plus babies make everything better, don’t you feel better already?”
I narrow my eyes, “No.”
“Liar.”
With a flick of her red hair, Willow lets herself in and crosses to the bed where she climbs on top of the mattress and folds her legs under herself, “Now we have a lot to talk about, don’t you think?”
“Have you seen him?” I ask quietly as I make my way to her, gently getting onto the bed before I rest my back on the headboard and get comfortable with Hope in my arms.
“Earlier,” She cocks her head, “Bast wouldn’t let him in.”
I nod, “How was he?”
“Why don’t you call him?”
I shake my head, “I don’t think I can talk to him yet.”
“Do you remember anything?” She asks.
“Some things, there’s still bits I’m missing but little pieces are coming back to me.”
“I can’t even imagine…” She lets out a long breath, “You must be so confused.”
“You have no idea,” I huff a humorless laugh, “Thing is, I know I love him even if I don’t remember it, and everything is so twisted up, I feel heavy. And I’m so fucking sad, Willow.”
She reaches forward and touches my knee, urging me to continue.
“I’m sad for me, but I’m sad for him. I can’t even hate him for lying to me, even if I don’t understand why. I wish I could, but I can’t.”
“You and Killian have always hadsomething; it may not have been obvious to everyone, but we saw it. He watches you, searches for you every time he walks into a room even when he knows you’re not there.”
“He created the art in my studio,” I look down at the sleeping baby, hoping it will help with the burn in my eyes.
“You remember that?”
“No,” A soft smile touches my lips, “I know it though. He promised me he’d create me anything I wanted.”
“I never pegged Kill to be an artist,” Willow laughs.
“No, me either,” I agree, “But he’s good, I’ve seen them.”
“So, what do you want to do?”
“Have you ever felt tied to someone? Like it makes no sense, there’s no reason for it but no matter how hard you push back, it doesn’t go away?”
“Yes,” She whispers, “It’s how I feel with yourbrother.”
“I don’t know what to do,” I start to hand Hope back to her mother, “But I know I need time, I need my memories, and I need to figure out if whatever we had is strong enough for me to forgive him for lying.”
Chapter Fifty-three
It’s been four days since I last saw her. Four days of unanswered texts and calls, four days of going to Sebastian’s house only to be told to fuck off, which I expected. I’m actually more surprised he didn’t add to the mess of bruises on my face. I wish he had, it’s what I would deserve.
I’d take every beating, every punch for a chance to catch a glimpse of her.
