That night is burned into my memory, and it will be forever.
“And when you did, it just… exploded.”
“How long?” She whispers.
“Months, Savannah.”
Pain twists her features.
“Every time, I told myself it was the last time. I was betraying your brother, our friends by sneaking off behind their backs. You begged me to tell them, but I refused.”
A single fat tear rolls down her cheek.
“The night of your accident, we were out with everyone for drinks but before we got there, we’d had an argument about telling them. I told you no and it was left unresolved. I pretended there was nothing between us that night, I put on a show for our friends that there was nothing between us and during it all I watched you crumble. I saw it with my own eyes, you were devastated.”
She swipes at more tears on her cheeks, her lower lip quivering as she attempts to hold it all in.
“Fuck, Savannah, it killed me, but I was a coward, there’s no other way to say it. I was and I still didn’t tell them. Instead, I thought it would be better if we ended.”
The shame and guilt of my decision has never lessened since that night, it burns and leaves a foul taste in my mouth, a ghost that can never move on.
“So you came to my house after I failed to show up like I had every night before that and you confronted me. And I ended it.”
“You chose them.” She whispers. “You chose my brother.”
There’s a painful squeezing inside my chest, like someone has shoved their hand right through my ribcage and have my heart inside their fist.
“I ended it, and you left, and then you got into your accident, and you forgot it all. All the pain, all the bad times, the good times too. It was like it never happened, like I never hurt you. And I wanted that to be a fact. I never want to hurt you, Savannah and I did.”
She rolls her lips, “So it was a get out of jail free card, right?”
“No,” I sigh, “It was a ‘she deserves better than someone who is too afraid to do right by her card’. You deserve more than secrets and sneaking around, and that was all I could offer then so I thought it better to let you go.”
She laughs and then abruptly stands up, “And that’s where this all falls apart, Killian.”
I remain seated at the table, watching her, waiting to see what she does. This is her space and her time, and I am just a speck of dust in her universe.
“Because you made a decision based on whatyouthought was best. You took away my options. You forced my hand. You made the decision on what was best for me. You’re right, you are a coward.”
She’s almost out of the kitchen when her security system alerts of a presence on the property. It rings loudly, sounding throughout the house.
“What the fuck is that?” Savannah hisses.
“Your security system,” I explain, “Dean put it back live today.”
“Well, what is it doing?”
I bring up the app on my phone and pull up the live feed on the camera, spotting Sebastian getting out of his car at the end of the driveway.
“Telling you, you have a visitor. Open the door, Savannah, your brother is here.”
Chapter Fifty-one
Ihave far too much going on inside my head right now to deal with my brother.
Based on everything Killian has told me, he knows and that’s why he is here, he wants to talk about it. And when Killian shows me the feed from the camera, I can see he is pissed.
I’m not sure how I am meant to fight a battle I don’t remember starting.
