What happens when this is over?
What happens when my parents come back and I’m no longer free? This sense of freedom, this lightness inside of me will soon fade the moment they come back in a week. The cage doors will lock tight, and I’ll have nothing left.
River left this morning, through the window even though I’d told him he could walk out the front door, but he’d jokingly said he was doing it to get used to it since he’d be doing it for the foreseeable future, especially when my parents came back, and I wasn’t to be so easily accessible. Even he knows this will become more difficult soon enough.
We’ve eaten takeout every night, he’s ordered something different for me so I could try it, picking out his favorites from the menu to be delivered and has watched me every time I triedit. He knew instantly if I didn’t like something, I don’t know how, but he did. He took it away and handed me something new, keeping it up until my reaction to the taste satisfied him.
We haven’t kissed since that first time, at least not in the same way. He’s kissed my cheek, my shoulder, my neck and hand, but never my mouth. And I wake every morning to the feel of his hardness pressing against my backside, but he just rolls over and pretends like it isn’t there before he disappears into the bathroom and then leaves for the day.
It only leaves me aching more. I cannot satisfy it, no matter how hard I try, and I havetried. So now I’m walking around constantly thinking about it, knowing he feels the same way. How does he deal with it?
With a groan, I get out of bed and change into my bikini before I make my way downstairs and onto the patio, laying a towel down on one of the beds beside the pool. The sun heats my skin as I lay there, and I try to focus on my book, but it isn’t helping. I can’t take my damn mind off of it.
Could I just go over there?
Could I give it to him? Would he even want it?
I won’t get another chance of being this free, of being able to do this. But what if he rejects me?
He hasn’t kissed me since, so maybe he’s not into it as much as I am, but then why would he stay?
Fuck, I’m so damn inexperienced here and I have no idea what to do. I could ask Zara, but I feel like she’d try to talk me out of it. She doesn’t trust River, but I do. I don’t know why since I don’t even really know him, but Idotrust him. I feel safe with him.
And it’s that thought that has me springing up from the sunbed and jogging through the house. I trust him, I trust him withthisand if he doesn’t want it, then that’s okay. I’m willing to take that risk. I want him and I can’t deny it any longer.
I quickly change into a white and yellow sundress and brush out my hair before I slip my feet into a pair of sandals, grab a few things and the keys to my car.
The drive across town passes quickly and surprisingly, I remember the way to River’s garage easily. My tires crunch over the gravel in the lot outside, noticing the sliders are open but I can’t see him working.
Pulling to a stop, I take a breath and calm my nerves, pushing away the thoughts that I’m too much, too needy.
Stepping from the car, I square my shoulders and lift my chin, making my way toward the garage.
“River?” I call his name, but he doesn’t answer, and a quick scan shows he isn’t in the workshop, so I make my way towards the reception area.
Only I freeze in the door.
River is there but so is Rachel.
He’s got her wrists in his hands and while his face is thunderous, she’s all smiles and wide eyes. The door slams as I let it go, the shock making my arms weak. Both their heads whip toward me and a lead weight lands in my stomach.
“Oh,” I squeak out, humility making my cheeks burn and eyes sting. I’d thought it all wrong, read it all damn wrong. Shit, how could I have been so damn stupid?
“Oh look,” Rachel giggles, “It’s your rich bitch. Isn’t this a little awkward?”
“Marly,” River rushes my name out on a breath.
“I’m sorry,” I stammer out, “I was just, um, I was just here because I realized I didn’t pay for the food.” I choke out the excuse, “I wanted to pay you back.” I keep going and begin to dig into my purse, “Here.” Dropping the several hundred-dollar bills onto the counter, I turn around and start to flee. Of course, it was too much but I don’t have the capacity to work it out right now and honestly, he can keep it.
I feel so stupid.
Rachel’s laugh follows me as the door swings shut behind me, the sound like ice running down my spine.
“Shit!” River hisses but I’m not stopping for anything.
I’m halfway to my car when I hear him.
“Marly! Wait!” He yells.
