I push away from him, ignoring the feelings he’s stirred up inside of me and stand, wrapping my arms around myself.
“I think we need to go back,” I stare toward the view and not at him. I’m not strong, I’m not powerful, I’m just Marly Winchester and I think if I look at him, I’ll break.
“Okay,” He replies. I step off the blanket and keep my eyes averted, not wanting to see his expression. Is it anger? Disappointment? Regret for even trying?
When I hear him moving back to the car, I follow, him stopping to open the passenger door for me.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him, finally lifting my eyes to his face.
His expression is purposely blank, but his dark eyes move over my face and then they drop to my lips, “Don’t ever apologize for telling a person no, Marly. No doesn’t require an explanation or an apology.”
Chapter Seventeen
River pulls into the makeshift lot at the side of the track, a fire is raging in a barrel next to the beverage table and the moment the engine is stopped, I see Zara pushing through the crowd toward us, her face a mask of concern. She gets my door open long before River ever gets the chance and I step out, only for her to pull me toward the trunk, a red solo cup, half empty with beer in her grasp and Jake watching her every move.
“Are you okay!?” She hisses, looking me over from head to toe. Zara acts more like a big sister than best friend and she always has done. She’s a year or so older than I am but we’ve been friends since we were both still in diapers. She’s the only person that matters to me, more than my own family ever will, but her love can also be suffocating.
“I’m fine,” I tell her, subtly removing myself from her grip and disguising it by pretending to straighten out my clothes even though there isn’t a single wrinkle to be seen.
“It all happened so fast,” She goes on, “First he broke that guy’s arm and then you were in his car!”
“I know.”
“I mean did you see that!?” She whisper hisses, “Hebrokehis arm!”
“I saw it,” I tell her.
“And you still got in his car!?”
At that, I frown, “Why wouldn’t I?”
She blinks slowly, “Um, because he broke some guy’s arm.”
“Because he touched me.” I remind her.
“Well yes, but do you not think that was a little extreme?”
I mean it was, but I don’t say that and shrug instead.
Her brows lower, “Where did you go?”
“To a lookout,” I choose not to lie to her, “We hung out for a bit.”
I look beyond her shoulder to where I can see River waiting with Jake and a blush steals over my cheeks, remembering what he felt like beneath me. It’s not even a big deal, is it? But it was hard and right there, and I could have finally gotten rid of this damn V-card I’m carrying around like it’s some kind of poker chip to be won at a table.
“Oh god, did you–”
“No!” I interrupt her, “No, of course not.”
“But you want to?” She quirks a brow.
“I don’t know,” I answer.
She purses her lips, “Just be careful, okay. I’m not sure I trust him.”
“I’m always careful, Zara.” I sigh, “Can we just go back to them? Jake is watching you like he may come and steal you away if we stay here any longer.”
Her cheeks flame red and I’m thankful for giving her the distraction. She links her arm with mine and spins us to make our way back to the guys, the beer in her cup sloshing over the rim.
