She spins on me, chewing her lip. We fought when we were kids, all the time, over trivial things and over tough things too. We fought a lot when Ethan was born and most of the time her heart is in the right place, but she tries to act older than she is, tries to pretend to be something she isn’t and yesterday, she went too far, regardless of whether I told her who Kolt was.
She closes the space between us quickly and envelops me in a warm hug. I hug her back, holding her tight. She’s my only family, the only constant I could rely on.
“I’m sorry,” She whispers.
“Me too,” I reply, tucking my head into her neck.
We stay embraced for a little bit longer before she releases a breath and pulls away, keeping her hands at my shoulders as her eyes search my face. I guess she’s just making sure I’m okay and when she’s satisfied that I am, she nods and then says, “So can you tell me everything now?”
I laugh, “What do you mean?”
“Imeanhow the hell you ended up with an Avery brother? And not just any Avery brother, the brother no one really knows about!? Did you know he was adopted?”
I roll my eyes, “Yes, I know that. And I don’t know how, it just happened.”
“Okaaayy,” She drags out the word, “That doesn’t just happen, when did you meet him?”
“Five years ago, when he was here for Torin after Grace died.”
She nods following and then gasps, “I knew you were up to something!”
“Yes well,” I push it off, “It wasn’t supposed to be anything then.”
It feels like a lifetime ago and while most of it was good, part of it was stained by our departures. I still have nightmares about that night, about being held hostage by men who wanted to kill me and Kolt. Did I fully understand the whole of it? No, I didn’t, but I didn’t blame Kolt for it either.
It was easier saying goodbye to him then than it was the second time round, even if I did pine over him. I still like to believe I would have moved on eventually but who knows how long that would have taken.
“Okay but that wasn’t when Ethan was conceived,” She pries.
“I’m not going intothatwith you, Imogen,” I laugh.
“I don’t need the details! But he left before you went to college,” she says, “I remember Ruthie saying how he didn’t even say goodbye to his brothers.”
I wince on his behalf, “I never pegged you to be a gossip.”
She waves it off, “So it wasn’t then, so when? How did you two see each other again?”
“We just did.” I never told anyone about what happened with Patrick or that Kolt saved me from an attack that would have scarred me for life. “And then Ethan was here.”
She sighs, I didn’t want to get into all of it, or rehash how it felt to find out he was gone, and I was going to be doing this alone.
“Have you forgiven him?” She asks finally.
“I’m working on it,” and that was the truth because even if I do allow my walls down with him and let him in, I think I’ll always worry he’ll leave once more. And loving him makes me want to forget about it. Forget it ever happened.
And that’ll just lead to more heartbreak for me, and I don’t think I’ll recover from that.
Chapter Thirty-five
It’s awkward with Vanessa’s sister, but I had expected that and while I respect Vanessa’s decision to let go of what happened yesterday, I can’t help but feel a little cold toward her. I don’t know Imogen well, just like I don’t know anyone here at all really, and I know she loves her sister dearly, it was still a shitty thing to do. It’s about respect and boundaries.
Just like calling Rett out when he was disrespectful to her the day before.
The conversation flowed fine, but we didn’t talk about much, mainly Ethan and settling into town. She pried for information about us, but Ness shut it down.
And an hour later we‘re leaving, without our son. Imogen had asked to keep him for the night, something the two sisters did often, it gave Ness a break and gave Imogen some time with hernephew. According to them they had everything they needed for an overnight stay and had practically shooed us out the door.
The snow is still falling, coating the town some more and we trudge through it on the way back to the bungalow.
