He arches an eyebrow. “What makes you think I haven’t?”
I shake my head softly. “You haven’t.”
If Sin knew I freed two creatures from his realm, or if he knew I blasted Leon into a wall… I shudder to think how quickly my existence would be terminated. But he’s back to looking suspicious, so I bluff, “The way you reacted tonight when you learned about the corrupted bond. If you’d been digging in my head, you’d already have known.”
Sin’s jaw works like he’s deciding whether to believe me until he finally turns away again. “It’s a last resort. I know all too well what it’s like to have your free will ripped away. Unless I think you’re a serious threat, your thoughts are your own.”
He grumbles his answer like he’s loath to admit such an honorable thing.
I get it. It really reflects poorly on his villain-cred.
Still, it’s enough to ease my fear of him being in my head – until another thought has me snapping up ramrod straight. “Would I still be me? Or would I become her – Cassandra?”
Oh god, what if I lose myself and become content to serve as Leon’s obedient Keeper? What if I let him blow up my realm?
Sin shrugs. “Your own consciousness is tied to this body. It’s very unlikely that you’ll lose yourself. But you’d have Cassandra’s memories within reach, just like your own.”
I swallow. “Unlikely isn’t a guarantee.”
I don’t consider myself a big gambler. The rural Atlantic Coast didn’t have anything in the way of casinos, and I was way too frugal to buy scratch tickets.
Sin pushes off the balcony. “It isn’t. The choice is yours. But…”
I wait for a breath for him to continue. He doesn’t. “But what?”
He appraises me like he’s trying to decide if I’m worth the effort of embellishing. “Cassandra was a warrior. As you are now, your only value is in the bond between you and Leon. You’re weak and dependent on whoever can offer you protection. Like this, you’ll never know freedom. You don’t have years to train. But with her memories, you might not need them. You might become something more than the destiny the Council chose for you.”
Sin’s words are blunt, but I can’t deny there’s truth to them. My hands shake, and I tuck them under my arms, hugging myself.
I don’t want to be weak.
I don’t want to be afraid anymore.
“Okay,” I answer. “Let’s do this.”
Sin nods. “Your room. You’ll probably black out,” he notes as he heads back to the castle.
I follow him, trying not to think too hard about what I’m about to do. This is just another adrenaline-inducing activity.
It’s totally fine. My hands have always felt this clammy.
Sin leads us upstairs to our shared hallway and opens my door. But instead of heading in right away, hestills, his expression darkening. The look is gone almost instantly, though, and we head inside.
I frown at his micro evil villain expression but shrug it off. The guy seems to have a lot of people issues. And really, I’m not going to judge, because same.
Sin pauses next to my bed, his gaze locked on something. It takes me a second to realize what he’s staring at.
The blanket.Hisblanket, that I borrowed (stole).
“Erm, so how should we do this?” I ask, trying to distract him from my mad thieving skills.
I’m about to let the guy I robbed mess around with my head. This is a new level of stupid, even for me.
Am I going to let that realization stop me?
Of course not.
“Lay down on the bed,” Sin orders.