Right.
“I’ll be quick,” I answer as I open the sliding door, climb into the van, and close it behind me, letting him stand outside. In record time, I change into my running outfit and sneakers before I step back out to him, but he scrutinizes me from head to toe. “What?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest, feeling rubbed the wrong way by his gaze.
“You run every day, and you only ever wear this or the other outfit,” he states.
I look down at my black tights and black jacket with holes for the thumbs, frowning before walking toward the boardwalk.
“Wow, I just told you I wash them,” I grumble.
Maybe not often enough.
“That’s not what I meant. Sorry, that came across wrong. I wanted to ask if you need anything,” North corrects as he walks beside me, now closer than before.
“No, I don’tneedanything. I’m fine,” I say, maybe a little too pissed off, so I follow up with a weak “Thank you” before I start to run.
We run in silence, the wind rustling my ponytail as we make it to the beach. The breeze is cold, but the sun, already a little higher than usual over the horizon, makes it tolerable. Stepping up onto the boardwalk, our feet thud on the wood, and it lets me know that North is just behind me, keeping up with my pace even though I know he could run much faster without me.
I try to clear my head and get out all the complicated feelings, which have been even worse since yesterday.
I could have all of them.
They all want me.
They won’t make me choose.
I’m so focused on Nash’s words that I don’t see the plank of the boardwalk slightly sticking out, and I trip over it. But before I can even fall, North is there, having grabbed me around the waist and pulled my back into his chest, panting hard like I am.
His scent of spices mixed with a faint sheen of musky sweat fills my nose, and the smell goes right to my pussy, making me push my thighs together. Visions of us sweating and panting in another setting swarm my mind and make me gasp.
Fuck.
I should stand straight again and get my shit together, but instead, I lean back against North, and he holds my weight easily as he nuzzles the side of my face, nudging my head gently to the side so he can whisper into my ear. “I’m an idiot, a coward, and don’t deserve you,” he echoes the same thing I told Saylor while I was running weeks ago with North following me like a stalker.
He heard that?
“You were right about everything. You changed me, and even if you’ll never forgive me, I will apologize and try to make it right for the rest of my life because yousaved me, Blue.”
I really do want to believe him, but belief is a tricky thing—slippery and elusive. Dumbfounded, I stand straight, turning to look at him with wide eyes, but he crouches in front of me,inspecting my foot that caught on the plank. He looks me over with his single-minded focus, making me feel like the center of his world. And right now, it’s so damn hard to shut out the feelings that are bubbling up.
I have to remind myself that he was the one pushing me in the dirt.
Calling me a gold digger.
And…
“Big words directed at a lying,crazywhore,” I spit out, the hurt winning over.
He comes to stand in front of me again, nodding. “I deserve that.” I frown, but he continues, “You don’t have to believe what I say. I wouldn’t believe myself either. But don’t look away. Keep your eyes on me. Watch me change for you.”
His eyes are open, so honest that I need to look away even though he just told me not to. I turn and walk back the way we came because I fucking hurt my big toe and am not going to run anymore, even though I should run away from Satan at my back.
It’s silent, but his words repeat on a loop in my mind. When we’re off the boardwalk and on our way back to the van, I walk a little slower, letting North catch up with me, which he does.
“You stepped back as CEO,” I state, not a question, although it is one.
“You heard about that?” he asks, honestly surprised.
“Was that for me too? Is that part of what I should watch?” I ask him, my fists clenched at my sides, trying hard not to get too emotional.
