Lio is pale, although his cheeks are red, sweating heavily. A pearl of sweat runs down his temple. His hair is wet, and a wheezing sound escapes him with each breath.
He has no time.
“I can’t do this, Jessica. I can’t. There has to be another way. Any other way. I can’t have them thinking I’m crazy.” I start to tremble, and I feel my pulse in my throat. My hands are sweating nearly as much as Lio.
“You can. You just don’t want to because you’re a coward,” Jessica yells at me, looking like a protective mother bear. She huffs before turning and going to Lio’s other side again. “My son is dying, and you don’t want to help because you’re scared that your new boyfriends won’t like you anymore? Let’s see how you’ll feel when my son is dead, the son of one of them, and you know you could have prevented it easily if you hadn’t put yourself before everyone else.”
Am I doing that?
“Yes, you are. Playing with all of them because you can’t choose? Can’t decide? You’reselfish. And I wouldn’t care if you were selfish with them, but you can’t be selfish with him.” She looks down at Lio, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I failed him, and it will haunt me forever. His father is failing him because of me, and I will never be able to right this again. Don’t fail him too.” Her eyes meet mine, the desperation evident. “Don’t let him atone for the mistakes everyone around him did and does. He doesn’t deserve it.”
She’s right. He doesn’t.
I think about my Nan and what she would do.
But I don’t even have to ask myself that.
I know.
I nod, letting go of Lio and forming my trembling hands into fists, breathing deeply. Jessica’s face lights up with hope when she sees me nod just as the door gets opened again more fully, and North steps back in.
FORTY-NINE
North’s faceis clouded with worry. I can tell Hunter’s phone call was unsuccessful by the way he looks at me. I meet his gaze, feeling the weight of Jessica’s words bearing down on me.
“Could Hunter get through?” I ask anyway, my voice trembling slightly.
North shakes his head. “No, he’s still on hold.”
I take a deep breath, feeling a knot tighten in my stomach. “North, can I… talk to you for a minute?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
He nods, concern etched across his features. “Sure, what’s wrong? Was I too rough with you?” he asks, reaching out to grab my hand, squeezing it softly.
No, but this is going to hurt.
I glance at Jessica, who shoots me a glare, so I tell him, “Let’s go to my room. I don’t want to wake him up with too much talking.”
Quietly, we leave Lio and Jessica behind and make our way to my room. With each step, the knot in my stomach grows, and by the time we step inside my room and close the door behind us, the tension in the air is palpable. I can see the confusion in North’s eyes as he waits for me to speak.
I take a deep breath, trying to find the right words, but they escape me. My heart races, and I finally blurt out, “Jessica told me something, something about Lio’s condition.”
North raises an eyebrow. “What did you just say?”
“I know, this soundscrazy…” I cringe at the word, taking another deep breath, “… but I can see and talk to ghosts. Jessica is still here. She’s hanging on to Lio because of his condition. She wasn’t able to speak to me before, that’s why I only can tell you this now, but you’re treating him wrong. Lio doesn’t have asthma. He has cyst?—”
North’s confusion vanishes, replaced by a look of anger as he cuts me off. “Mydead wifetold you that my son is sick.” His tone conveys how much he does not believe a word coming from my mouth.
Fuck.
I take a step closer, my voice pleading. “North, you have to listen to me. She said it’s a hereditary disorder, and if it’s not treated properly, it could get worse. He could die. She’s worried about Lio.”
His anger flares, but he doesn’t move, only glaring at me. A few seconds pass before he suddenly reaches down and grabs my bag from the floor, out of which I’m still living, not brave enough to make myself at home in this room, all I have is in the bag.
He pushes my bag, overflowing with my stuff, into my trembling hands and forcefully turns me toward the door before he opens it. Panic surges through me like an electric shock, my heart pounding so hard I can practically hear it in my ears.
“North, listen to me,” I plead, desperation tinged with fear in my voice as he keeps shoving me forward.
“No, I’m done listening to your shit. Get out of my house, now!” he roars when we reach the entryway, where Hunter and Nash spot us from the kitchen. My chest tightens, and it’s as if the world is crumbling around me.
