Liliah was wary on the carriage ride home, studying her father to determine if he realized that Lucas had taken Meyer’s place. For if he had noticed, her plans for tomorrow would be much harder to keep. Yet as the carriage rolled away down the London streets toward home, her father didn’t remark on anything; rather the silence kept her company.
It was well into the next day when she started to lose the wary edge to her emotions and the feeling shifted to a rather panicky sense of anticipation. Each moment ticked closer to the time she’d arrive at Bond Street and, consequently, her assignation with Lucas. She held no doubts that he meant to follow through on his word, and she was both terrified and delighted.
Terrified because she truly didn’t know what to expect.
Delighted because she truly thought it would be remarkable.
“You do realize you’re still on the same page, Liliah,” Samantha remarked quietly, her gaze flickering to the library door as if to make sure their father wasn’t eavesdropping.
Heaven knows he’d probably stoop to that level.
Liliah sighed and turned the page. “Now I’m not.”
Samantha huffed. “Indeed.” She edged closer, closing the distance on the couch and whispered, “Why are you so distracted?”
Liliah bit her lip, wishing she could speak of it to her sister, but knowing she hadn’t the freedom. She wouldn’t dare put her sister in such a position, not with their father so demanding. “It is of little consequence. Simply pondering the future,” she answered honestly, albeit it a little cryptically.
“I see.” Samantha nodded sagely. “If I could somehow. . . fix the situation, please know that I would.” Samantha’s warm hand touched Liliah’s knee through her muslin dress. Tears pricked her eyes as she met Samantha’s earnest gaze.
“Thank you, yet I would not wish this on you, my dear. No. You”—Liliah reached out and squeezed her sister’s hand affectionately—“were made for love. Heaven owes us that, for we’ve been far too long in its absence.”
Samantha nodded once, a lonely tear slipping down her cheek. “Indeed. Perhaps someday. Until then, I do have you.”
“You have me. Always.” Liliah nodded, swearing the truth in her heart. The one silver lining in the whole disaster of marrying Meyer was the knowledge that he’d understand the need for Liliah’s involvement in her sister’s life, and would encourage meddling rather than discourage it. It wasn’t much of a silver lining, but she was determined to hold on to whatever she could grasp.
“Now then.” Liliah changed the subject. “Are you ready for our appointment this afternoon? I’m only thankful that our father hasn’t restricted those outings.”
“I hate the fittings,” Samantha grumbled, her hand sliding from her sister’s as she slouched in a rather unladylike manner against the couch cushions.
“They aren’t too terrible.” Liliah gave a dramatic sigh. “Surely you want your gowns to fit well, not as if they were purchased for someone else?”
“Indeed, yet it is simply tedious.”
“I’m quite certain you’ll survive the experience,” Liliah teased her sister, then took a fortifying breath. “I’ll take along Sarah to accompany us on our trip. I have a few errands to run.” What Liliah didn’t mention was that she would be leaving Sarah with Samantha.
“Oh, very well,” Samantha replied, not asking further questions. “I had better ready myself. What time is the appointment?”
“Two, so we should make haste and leave in half an hour.” Liliah’s heart pounded with anticipation and anxiety. How was it possible for a half hour to seem like both an eternity and a moment?
“I’ll have the carriage readied.” Liliah stood from her position on the couch and paused a moment before quitting the room, allowing the butterflies in her stomach to settle and the tingling in her spine to dissipate.
As she strode down the hall, the flutter in her belly gathered momentum. Once the carriage was ordered, she retired to her room to make herself ready. As she studied her reflection in the mirror, she wondered if there would be any perceptible difference after she was ruined. The thought was certainly sobering, yet it didn’t change her resolve.
No.
She wanted this.
Needed it.
A knock sounded on her door and she jumped in response. As her heart pounded its frightened rhythm, she called out, “Yes?”
Sarah peeked in, her expression sober. “The duke wishes to see you, my lady.”
Liliah swallowed the fear that rose in her throat and nodded.
“He is waiting in his study, my lady.” Sarah curtseyed and left, closing the door softly.
Liliah smoothed her skirt and strode to the door, a million reasons for why her father wished an audience all fluttering through her mind. As she traveled the hall and descended the stairs, her footsteps echoed on the marble floor. The brass handle of her father’s study door was cold, hard, much like the man within. She pushed the handle slightly, opening the already slightly ajar door.
