“I think Rian needs some too,” Shai jokes, making me laugh.
We set the long table quickly, bringing the food out and placing it in the center. Fia made a large Irish meal—stew, boxty, cabbage with bacon, and bread.
“Let’s eat!” she calls out.
“Let me go help my mom,” Shai says, but I shake my head.
“I’ll get her. Sit, pet.”
He flips me off but grins. He likes being taken care of, and I do too.
“Mama Kat.” I hold my hand out for her.
“I’m still sad my son found you first,” she teases, and as inappropriate as she is, it makes me laugh. Chaos recognizes chaos, I guess. As long as she’s good to Shai, I don’t care howwild she is.
Dinner is full of loud laughter and conversation—Conan, Finan, Rian, and Flynn having joined the rest of us. After the meal, we clean up, and then everyone gathers in the living room. Ash, I notice, lingers behind. I slip from the room and return to the kitchen. She’s leaning against the counter, glued to her phone, and I join her. “Oh, hey,” she says. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything is fucking perfect.” I grin widely.
“Just a few months ago you didn’t think you knew how to fall in love. You certainly didn’t want to, and look at you now.” She nudges me with her arm.
“I love him, but I’m also obsessed with him,” I explain.
“I would expect nothing less.” She drops her head to my shoulder. “I’m glad you’re happy. I knew you’d be good at it.”
“Good at what?”
“Loving someone the way you love Shai.”
“Only because it’s him.”
“That’s what love is.” She sighs.
“Are you in love with Zuri?”
Her silence is all the confirmation I need. “Yes, but I don’t know if it will last.”
“Why the fuck not?”
“Nothing…everything…I’m scared.”
I huff in reply. “You’re not afraid of anything. You’re the bravest person I know.” I wrap my arm around her.
“I don’t always feel like it.”
“You put on a good show.”
“Don’t we all? Ignore me. The last few days have just been a lot. Dean was shot last year, now Conan and Kat got shot.”
“This is our life, Ash.”
“I know. Like I said, ignore me. I’m being a baby.”
I kiss the top of her head. “Want me to kidnap her?”
She snorts out a laugh. “Maybe I can Stockholm her into falling in love with me and being okay with who we are.”
“This doesn’t have to be who you are. It’s not who Fia is.”
