I pull my hand back, and that inner solace disappears. “Rowan …”
“Don’t think. Just tell me what your heart is saying.”
I shrug. “It says I love you, too. But?—”
“Then I don’t care how we got started or what it’s going to take to make this work. I just know I need you in every way. I don’t want anything unless I can have it with you.” His eyes search mine desperately as he says it.
“I’m afraid I’m not as easy to love as you think I am,” I reply, reaching up to stroke his face.
“I fell for you within the first hour I met you. By the end of that night, I knew you were my soulmate. My heart beats for you and noone else, and it always will,” he tells me, putting my hand on his chest again. “I could understand if you didn’t feel the same way about me, but I don’t think that’s what’s holding you back.”
I close my eyes and inhale deeply. “Of course I feel the same.”
“Then why are we wasting time apart?”
“Because … because I’m the opposite of what you need,” I say, grasping at straws. But I know it’s all in vain. He knows it, too.
“You areallI need,” he corrects me, his smile growing when I let out a defeated groan. He invites me back into his arms, and I give up.
“I’d like to tell you I love you and need you, too. But I’m afraid you’ll pull a ring out of your pocket or something,” I mumble.
“What if I promise to get down on both knees, just the way you like it?” he returns before he dips his head and kisses me, making me hum contentedly.
“You don’t really have a ring, do you?” I ask in between kisses.
“Don’t make me answer that,” he replies, just inches away from my mouth, and I whimper. “You’re not going to hold out on me forever, are you?”
I shake my head. “Oh, no, baby. I put out, remember?”
He throws his head back in a loud guffaw, reminding me more of one of my crazy cackles than anything, and I can’t help but join him.
Rowan rests his forehead against mine when our laughter dies down, and I inhale deeply, reveling in his admiration.
“Claire?”
“Hmm?”
“Don’t be mad, but I also bought the plot of land beside Landry and Daisy. It doesn’t have to beours, necessarily. It’s more of an insurance policy, just in case you’d be willing to let me fulfill your barn fantasy one day.”
My lips curl up into a smile. “I guess Frankie and Oscar are going to need to get their asses in shape with all that space to roam.”
He growls before he cups his hand around my jaw and brings me in for another kiss.
“Is that your EpiPen in your pocket, or are you thinking about that barn loft, too?” I ask breathlessly after we finallybreak apart.
He crooks an eyebrow. “Only one way to find out.”
This time I’m the one who cackles.
We slip back inside the house a few minutes later, and I look at Rowan in confusion when we’re greeted by cheers and applause. He smirks and hitches his thumb at the TV, which must have been broadcasting our conversation.
He opens his mouth to comment, but his expression immediately shifts, and my embarrassment is instantly forgotten once I recognize the look of fear in his eyes.
“Hey, are you okay?” I ask, stepping forward to take his hand.
He shakes his head, and his chest heaves. “No, I don’t think so.”
My eyes dart around the room and find everyone’s attention rapt as Rowan begins hyperventilating. My pulse throbs in my ears as I brace myself for the worst again, but he doesn’t make a move to run out. He simply stands there, panic-stricken, reminding me of the times he hesitated to claim me in public before.
