I hear the door open and then gentle footsteps padding into the room before they leave.
Panic strikes me as I open my eyes.
He’s gone.Where the fuck has he gone?
I’m about to get up when he comes back into the room.I squeeze my eyes closed, but then I hear him shuffling on the other side of the bed, so I open them again.
He comes into my line of sight, shins clad in black combat trousers, his feet bare.Then he bobs down and stares at me.
There’s a second when I think he’s going to say something along the lines of “I saw you” or “What the fuck did you think you were doing?”or “Do you get off on watching people in the shower?”But instead, he just stares at me until I have to speak, because if I don’t, I’ll crack.
“Morning.”I smile.
“Yes, it is.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”I drop my smile.
“I know.”
I can’t read him.I don’t know what he’s thinking.Did he see me looking at him?Does he know I was touching myself?
Shit.This is awful.
Willing myself to carry on, I think of the most mundane thing to say.
“What’s the weather looking like?”I ask.
“White.”
Okay, so he’s in one-word mode.
I’m about to say that I’m going to jump in the shower, but then I stop.I don’t want to mention showers.Instead, I sit up and yawn loudly as Fenrir stalks to the other side of the room and tells me he’s going to leave me to get dressed.
As soon as he’s gone, I slump over and place my head in my hands.
I’ve no idea if he saw me.Should I confess?
No, absolutely not.The best thing to do is to carry on as normal.
But what is normal around here?
FORTY-TWO
FENRIR
PRESENT
Puttingon some deodorant and then running a comb through my hair, I wait ten minutes for Hayami to get dressed.
It wasn’t the dream of her sitting on my face that woke me.No, it was the reality of her grinding her ass against my hard-on.Because that wasn’t a dream.That was real.She was curled up next to me, rubbing herself against me, and there was no way on this earth I could lie there any longer without crawling on top of her and taking care of whatever dream she was having.
It must have woken her, my hotfooting it into the en suite and turning on the shower, but I was too wrapped up in taking care of my needs to think she would get out of bed and come watch the show.
But she did.
It should have made me stop, should have dried up all my carnal desires when she ducked from the open door.Instead, it only made me come harder.The only thing I’m unsure of is how she felt when she was watching me.I’d like to think that if she’d been repulsed, she would’ve stopped looking and moved away well before the end.Or was it like a car crash where you couldn’t help but stare even though you didn’t want to?Besides, I have no idea how long she’d been there, so I guess I’ll never know.
Whatever she felt, the atmosphere is now thick and palpable, and I’m not sure how long we’ll be able to keep up this façade that everything is normal.
