“What do you want to know?” I asked after a few moments had passed.
She sighed, “Anything real.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“My favorite color is green. Like a forest.”
“A forest? You’ve actually seen a forest?”
Shit.
“Yeah, before I came to the city.”
“How did you get access to the city?”
And there it was. The question I knew would inevitably pop up, and the one I had adamantly avoided. While my accent usually gave me away, I dodged it by telling them a version of the truth— that I’d been allowed to come here due to my family. Usually that was enough of an answer to satiate people’s curiosity. But I knew Odessa would want to know more. She deserved to know more, but I couldn’t give her that. Not yet. Not until we were at the finish line and out of here safely. Only then could I feel comfortable revealing my most inner secrets.
“It’s a long story,” I said hoping that would buy me some time.
“Yeah, well it looks like we have some time,” she quipped.
“I don’t talk about this, Odessa. It’s private for a reason, and I’d hate to put you in a dangerous position.”
“More dangerous than the one we’re in right now?”
I was silent. If she knew the truth, it would put her in a world of trouble. And while I was angry as hell at her for walking away from me, I couldn’t do that to her. The burden was mine and mine alone to carry.
“Let’s just say, you’re better off not knowing.”
“Fine. So, your favorite color is green. Anything else?”
“I like to sing,”
That caught her by surprise. She glanced over at me with a tilt to her head that I’d come to know as her interest being piqued.
“Like what?”
“Like songs.”
She gave me a heavy sigh. “Fucking hell, getting you to open up is harder than opening a pickle jar.”
“Yeah, well, opening up in the past hasn’t served me all that well. Especially when I entrust pieces of myself to someone who’s just going to up and leave.” Maybe that was cruel, but it was the truth.
She gaped at me but then schooled her features back into neutral. Like she didn’t care at all. She might like calling me a liar, but she was one too. And she was lying to herself.
“Yeah, okay, Dex. I left. I walked away because you scare me on so many levels that I don’t know what to do with. But I’m not like you. Everything I feel? Everything I am, is so close to the surface. My emotions and my thoughts spill out of me easily. I don’t know how to stuff all that I am into a little box like you do.”
“Well, then you’re lucky that you’ve never experienced the type of pain that makes you want to hide who you are from the world. To know that as much as you might want to trust someone, your track record shows that you’d be a fool to try again.”
“You’re right. I haven’t experienced that. But I also know that without trust, you can’t have a relationship. And this fucked up place breeds distrust. How am I supposed to trust that you won’t turn on me the second we get close to the finish line?”
“I guess you can’t. If my actions haven’t convinced you otherwise, I don’t know what else to tell you,” I said feeling every bit as bitter as the words I spat out.
As we walked, the tunnel became narrower. I had to duck down just to keep from hitting the ceiling.
The tunnel curved and opened up into a large expanse. There was a narrow bridge made of rock that had several chunks missing from it. A sheer drop awaited us on either side. To go forward, we would have to jump and hope we cleared with enough space to make it to the next piece. On the opposite end there was a tunnel that was glowing with a warm amber light. A part of me hoped that maybe, just fucking maybe, that tunnel led to the end, and we could be out of here.
