Yawn.
I mean, he’s sweet. And pretty for a fisherman character, but the dev hadSamsonavailable and squandered that honor to write a romance arc for a guy about as interesting as laminated paper.
Come on.
He’s named after a secondary mineral in basalt, for crying out loud.Basalt. Laumontite—an element inbasalt—dehydrates into white powder, which I guess explains why he’s set by theocean, but that is the most interesting rock fact I have for a secondary component of basalt.
Not huffy atall, I scan his neat penmanship.
Citrus,
Come see me when you get the chance. Neptun and I lost a lot in the storm, but I’ve found an old fishing pole you can have if you’d like. I’ll even show you how to use it if you’re interested.
It’s not much as thanks for all you’ve done for us, but know we’re both here for you however we can be.
Lau
The first paragraph is classiccome get the fishing tutorial over withscript. The second part, however, is a direct result of my existence as a freewill party in this narrative. How terrifying to know that someday my cheat codes will run out and I’ll have to navigate the world without them.
Tucking the new letters into the back of my journal with the other from Lazul, I check on my quest page.
Visit Lazul.
Learn how to fish from Laumon.
If fishing involves worms and realistic wait times, I will kindly pass. Shame. Fishing is normally one of my favorite minigames. Not a bad source of quick independent money either, since my access to the mines relies on Samson.
Speaking of Samson.
Fluttering my lashes, I speak to the pages of my journal, “Can we add aMarry Samsonquest to the list?”
No.
I pout. “How about the next step in securing a heart event with him then?”
Check the relationship page.
Eager, I flip right to his beautiful profile, innocently hopeful that I’ll find the heart outline that indicates a romanceable character beside my Samson’s name.
I do not.
I also do not find the eight usual empty friendship hearts that act as placeholders for the basic relationship events that all characters have.
Instead, I find a slew of question marks above his biography, which reads:
Samson: grumpy farmer next door, retired adventurer, certified recluse.
Mm.
Insightful.
I return to the quest page. “You hate me, don’t you?”
Not at all.
“He hates me, doesn’t he? This crossover UI isn’t made to shownegativeheart events, so it’s glitching out, isn’t it?” I sag on my bed. “My tendency to visit when the poor guy is clothing-impaired has sent his opinion of me plummeting. I am distraught. How much chocolate do you think it’s going to take to fix this? Am I going to go bankrupt?”
If I could roll my eyes at you…
