“I am,” I say. “You are right. But can we please talk?”
“I don’t want to talk, Reyansh. I need space. Is that so hard for you to understand?”
“It is not, but I cannot leave you alone when you are like this.”
She huffs, covering her eyes with her palms. “Why are you suddenly saying and doing all this when you’ve never done any of it before?”
Her accusations land straight to my gut.
“You have left me crying a lot of times, Reyansh,” she lets out. “This is just like those times. So, please leave me alone.”
A tear slips down her eyes, and my hands immediately latch onto them. Her eyes go wide as I wipe the tears from under her eyes.
“I know, Aisha.” I cradle her face in my palms, and when she tries to pull away, I still don’t let her go. “I know, and I am ashamed and sorry about that. But that doesn’t mean I will repeat the same mistakes. These three months were to fix things that I broke, and I am willing to work on that. I just ask you to…let me.”
“It is not that easy.”
“I know. But it is not that difficult either, baby. And I promise, no one will force you to do things you don’t want to. If after these three months you wish to leave me, I will let you go.”
The words hurt me as I say them, but I mean it. If after three months, I am unable to win her back, I will let her go. For how long, I don’t know, and I don’t say.
She looks in between my eyes, searching for a lie.
“Do you promise?”
As gut-wrenching as it is, I let myself say the words.
“I promise.”
Aisha Kapoor
Even though I am the one who initiated our divorce, a corner of my heart still hurts when Reyansh says that he will let me go after these three months are over—if I want to.
It is totally unfair of me to feel this way when all I have been doing is accuse him of binding me to this marriage, not letting me go easily, but what can I do? Being with Reyansh has been the most confusing thing in my life. I cannot think rationally when it comes to him.
His hand rubs soothing circles on my cheek, and that feels oddly comforting for some reason. There’s a throbbing pain in the back of my head, and I can only attribute it to the amount of reasoning and yelling I had to do with my mother just a few minutes ago.
Living abroad and away from her made me completely forget how arguments feel between us. She doesn’t listen, and I don’t either. We are a typicalkaleshiduo.
When she asked me to leave my work and go on a date with him, I thought she was joking considering the fact that she knows how much I value my work. I rarely take days off, not even if my health is down. It was only when I told her no quite a few times and she didn’t budge that I realized that for her the most important thing is my relationship with Reyansh and not my work.
She has always supported the fact that I would much rather have a career than a man in my life, but now that I am married, it seems her priorities have shifted, and not for good.
“I am sorry thatMaapushed you to do something you didn’t want to because of me,” Reyansh says, his hold on me still tight as if he thinks I will disappear or run away if he doesn’t hold me in his arms.
“It is not because of you.” I shake my head. “I think it’s more because now that I am married, she wishes I would prioritize family over work. After all, she did that. She left working after I was born. And her mom never worked in the first place. I always used to think that she understood how important it was for me to have a career, but I think her priorities have shifted now.”
Reyansh just keeps looking at me as I let everything off my chest, and I realize how lighter it instantly makes me feel.
I have never had to filter what I want to say when I am with him, which is a relief because growing up as the only daughter of my mother and living with my extended family, I had to bite my tongue so many times to not cause problems for my mother.
“I just…” I lick my lips trying to find better words for my feelings, and his eyes instantly track that movement, and my cheeks heat up. The tension between us is still the same, if not more. “I just find it so difficult to talk about my feelings. Especially with her because I know she won’t get what I mean. The generation gap between us and the way our minds work is so different. I don’t blame her, but just a little compassion would go a long way. I love my mom, Rey, but I cannot emphasize enough how much she gets on my nerves sometimes.”
He nods, and I take a deep breath. I know I was harsh on my mother, but it was all pent-up feelings coming out all at once.
“I understand,” he says, taking hold of my hands in his. He slowly brings them up to his lips, pressing a firm kiss on the back of my hand, and I feel my heart gaining life. “I know how hardit was for you and how hard it still is for you. But I want you to know that I understand. I know how important your career has been for you; after all, you have worked so hard for it, and I am so proud of you. One of the reasons why I fell for you is because you were unabashedly ambitious, and not only that, but you also weren’t afraid to admit that you would rather be alone than live a life with someone who didn’t accept your opinions. It takes courage to be like that, especially in a world like ours, which is so cruel to women who know their worth.”
There he goes, stealing a piece of my heart that already belonged to him but I had carefully guarded from him. The reason why I fell for him was because he wasn’t like other guys. Not in the cliché way. But in the way that he was raised so well that when he said he understood you, you could believe him. He didn’t say that to shut you down. When he said something, he meant it.
