“I’m an innocent, as you keep reminding me, but even I could see we have something special. Since we are speaking candidly, I never thought to askwhyyou were kissing Oliver. I mean, I understand you desire him, but isn’t it unusual for a man to desire another? Or am I being naïve?”
“It is notusual, but more common than you’d think, if that makes any sense. At least in my experience. I hadn’t started out with the burning desire to lay with another man. It wasn’t until I met my author friend in Paris that I ventured into unknown territory. You must understand, I...” The time was very painful. Grief-stricken, I’d left the day after Sally’s funeral on a quest to forget. “Well, you do understand.”
“Is that where you disappeared to after the funeral?”
“Yes, I met him at a tavern, and we struck up a conversation. He was married, and his wife, a famous gothic novelist, is a bohemian who believes in following your passions where they take you.”
“And they took you into his bed as well as hers?” She licked her bottom lip, her expressive eyes turning a smoky hue. The rise and fall of her chest became more pronounced. My story aroused her curiosity and her passions. “So last night wasn’t the first time you were with another couple?”
“No, it wasn’t.” I flipped my wrist around and linked my fingers with her warm ones. Silky skin met my palm, and I brought our combined hands to my mouth. I skimmed my lips over her knuckles, telling myself to stop but powerless to listen to the voice of reason.
“Do you know what I think?” she asked, leaning in close enough I could see each individual eyelash.
Our mouths hovered mere inches apart, making it hard to keep on topic. I had started the conversation with every intention of ending our intimacies, and yet I wanted to drag her into my lap and sink my cock into her pussy until we were both spent. “No, but I’m certain you’re about to tell me.”
“I think you should stop running away.” She angled her mouth until it fit with mine, her breath my breath. “Because wherever you go, there you are.”
“I’m not running away.” I pulled back from the kiss, giving truth to the lie. Her presence had a way of distracting me, and she’d played on my weakness. “I’m simply stopping a bad situation from getting worse.”
“Whether you join us or cut our association short, he will still feel the same way about you. The way I feel about you,” she said with an adamant nod.
Dread sent a knot to my gut at her declaration, cutting through the all-encompassing desire. “Amelia, I—”
“Never fear, I won’t declare my love for you nor ask for yours in return. Like you, I’m selfish, and I want what we had. Together. All three of us. But know this. You can’t stop someone from loving you. You can embrace it, say thank you, and take what they have to offer. If you don’t, you will end up bitter and alone. Is that what you want for yourself?”
Voices sounded from just outside the door, cutting our privacy short. Lady Hortense and her younger sister entered the room, followed by Lady Ellen. Amelia played the gracious hostess and greeted them.
I stood as was proper until they sat down at the large rectangular table. As I listened to them talk about Lady Gwendolyn’s health, I pondered Amelia’s words. Is that what I wanted for myself? My mind screamed no, but my heart cried yes. It was too soon to think past my day-to-day life.
I wanted to bed Amelia again. With Oliver. If I agreed to continue the affair, I wasn’t certain if it was fair to him. He was thinking with his cock. At nineteen, men tended to do that. I had been no different.
Lady Hortense tapped my sleeve. “Lord Noah, I hope you will let him.”
“Beg pardon?” I asked, embarrassed to be caught woolgathering.
“William wished for me to ask if Ethan could visit him in London,” she stated.
“Of course, I’m sure Ethan would enjoy that.” My son was a safe topic, and I focused my mind on small talk. My decision could wait until I could give it more thought. Time was on my side in this. I had a trip planned to tour one of the earl’s northern estates. While away, I would have time to clear my head.
No matter how far I went, I knew one thing for sure, I could never forget my night with the duke and duchess.
Chapter Thirty-One
Lord Oliver, Duke of Hayesford
