Wysdom: Hang on, Carolina. Looks like The God Among Men is online shopping for new shovels. Must. Stop. The. Madness.
Mama:Mija! Your Papa is loading his shotgun right now.
Carolina: *gif of The Supremes singing “Stop! In The Name of Love”*
Carolina: *sends a picture of Rand, Faylor, and Carolina at the wedding*
Carolina: *sends a picture of Rand and Carolina kissing while holding up their wedding rings*
Rand: That’s the chicken way of saying: we got married!
Celia: That’s awesome, blossom! CONGRATULATIONS! *heart emoji*
Celia: *gif of a New Year’s Eve balloon drop and confetti*
Flint: Happy for you both. Watch out for Luke, though. He didn’t get his full Sabervention in. *laughing face emoji*
Papa: You got married? WITHOUT US?
Mama: Eloped? WE WEREN’T EVEN THERE!
Carolina: Everyone - stand down. That’s the point of eloping. To sneak off and do it in secret.
Mama: Celia didn’t sneak off.
Celia: I mean… we TRIED to.
Mama: You tried to sneak away and get married?
Celia: *woman shrugging emoji*
Papa: CAROLINA SABER! That man didn’t even ask for your hand in marriage! Or even our BLESSING! THIS IS SCANDALOUS!
Mama: We might have to DISOWN YOU,Mija!
Carolina: Mama. Papa, I’m 46. I didn’t want a big wedding. I don’t need you to give me away. Plus: I’m not cattle. Also - no need for shouty caps!
Rand: Don’t you think their protests are a little much? *winky emoji*
Carolina: Wait. Did Rand tell you we were eloping?
Mama: (...)
Papa: (...)
Celia: (...)
Flint: (...)
Wysdom: #RandolinaRULES! *heart emoji*
Luke: YOU ALL KNEW????
Rand: *full screen of laughing emoji*
Rand: *full screen of bride and groom emoji*
Luke: You’re all dead to me.
