Morgan’s face pales.
“You want to tell him how you just sat there on the couchlaughingat fuck-knows-what while I beat his fucking teeth in with the handle of the toilet plunger?! Oh, I know. How about the time mom was all fucked up and accused me of stealing her Oxy? Remember that,Dad?!”
I violently shrug off my jacket, undo my sleeve button, and yank my shirt up over my forearm.
“Remember how she put cigarettes out on me until Iadmittedto selling the fuckin’ pills, even though she was the one who'd done them all and justforgot?” I smile coldly, running a fingertip over the scars on my inner forearm. “Do you remember how you did nothing and justwatched?!”
The table is silent. Fuck, the onesaround usare.
Val swallows, his face white as he looks at me. “Hey, Vaughn?—”
“You want more?” I grin maniacally as Demon shifts inside me. Snarls. And comes charging out.
Fuck.
“Yeah, let’s do some more!” I yell with a crazy-ass smile on my face. “We’ve got—” I frown. “I’vegot plenty.” I stab my gaze across the table at Morgan, whose face is now a mask of horror. “How ‘bout it,Pop? Think Val wants to replay the Christmas where you unwrapped all the presents on Christmas Evein front of usand then took off to go sell them for heroin?”
“Vaughn—” he croaks.
But we’re not done. We’re just getting fucking started.
Settle down. You can’t be here.
Oh, we’re fucking HERE, motherfucker. Let’s fucking goooo.
“How about the time you made me drink vodka until I puked because you thought it wasfunny?” I choke. “Or the times you had me hold your tie-off while you shot up? Oh, and lest we forget, there was that fun day when you came home early and Mom was still fucking one of her Johns on the couch while I keptpillows over Val's ears so he wouldn't hear.” I glare death at him. “And then you two started screaming at each other, and I walked out and told you that you were scaring Val, and you punchedmein the face for my pains.”
Morgan is silent, staring at me with a faraway look in his eye.
“I was fucking EIGHT YEARS OLD, MOTHERFUCKER!”
The whole fucking restaurant is silent now, and staring.
I whirl on my brother. “And you wonder why I wantfuck-allto do with this asshole?!” I choke. “You wonder why I’m ‘not trying’?!”
I spin to Evelina. “You starting to get why it wasn’t fuckingcuteto ambush me with this fucking shit?!”
Her face crumples. I look away and laser focus my rage on Morgan.
“You find ithard to comprehendthat we made it to New York?” I bark out a cold, brutal laugh. “Motherfucker, I find it hard to comprehend that I’maliveafter being so unfortune to be born as your fucking kid! You have noideathe shit I did to make sure Val and I survived in a world that wanted to grind us under its heel.” I shake my head at him. “Keep your apologies. Keep your fucking sobriety and your sanctimonious self-fucking-forgiveness. I’m not your redemption arc, I’m not your fucking Hallmark holiday movie, I’m yourchild,” I seethe. “And when Val and I needed you to own that responsibility, you threw us to the fucking wolves.”
It feels like the entireworldis silent as Demon slinks back into the shadows.
Morgan looks…empty. Shattered. Broken.
Good.
But Val does too. That’s…not.
I turn to him. “I…I didn’t mean to?—”
“It’s fine,” he murmurs. Then he stands. I can see the war on his face as he turns to our father. “This isn’t me saying goodbye, Morgan. But I do need some space to absorb this.”
Morgan looks up at my brother with pain in his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Val,” he chokes. “I’mso fucking sorry.”
Val nods. Then he turns to me. He doesn’t say anything, just drops a hand to my shoulder and squeezes.
Then he walks out.
