But then Rowan is there, and he takes my free hand, his fingers threading through mine and calming me almost instantly. His thumb brushes over my knuckles, a slow, soothing sweep.
“You’re being so brave,” he says quietly, and I think I’d find his words patronizing if they didn’t sink into me like a balm.“Just look at me, sweetheart. Keep your eyes on me.” So I do, locking my gaze onto his stormy eyes. His free hand cups my cheek, his thumb brushing away a tear I didn’t even realize had fallen.
“That’s it,” he says, soft but firm. “You’ve got this. I’ll be right here with you the entire time.”
I don’t look as the doctor hums to himself and arranges his tools on a sterile tray. The sounds alone are enough to make me cringe. Wrappers tearing open, soft metallic clinks. It all makes my stomach twist into a sickening knot.
God. I am such a baby.
Rowan’s thumb keeps tracing slow circles on the back of my hand, his other hand still cupping my face.
“You’re doing so well,” he says softly. “Just breathe for me, darling.”
I try, but my lungs feel too small. The doctor begins cleaning the cut with something cold and sharp-smelling. I flinch.
“Eyes on me, remember?” Rowan says, and I flick my gaze back to him. His eyes are warm, sympathetic, and his touch is tender. “Tell me about the first artifact you ever held.”
I swallow, flinching as the doctor injects something to numb my skin. “A— a Roman coin. My family went on vacation to Italy. I was twelve.”
“What type of coin was it? Do you remember?”
“I do. It was a silver Denarius with Hadrian on it. I still have it.”
The first stitch tugs at my skin. The pain is minimal thanks to the numbing agent, but the sensation is still sickening. I gasp, fingers tightening around Rowan’s.
“Good girl,” he says, and something in my chest loosens. “You’re doing so well. You can handle this. I know you can.”
I huff out a shaky laugh. “Yes, I’m clearly so big and brave.” I roll my eyes a little. The only boyfriend I’ve ever had mocked me endlessly for my blood phobia.
“You are.” His thumb brushes my cheekbone. “You moved halfway around the world to pursue your education. You stood up for Janik when Professor Cameron accused him of plagiarism. You followed me into the woods and participated in an ancient ritual with me.” He grins, lines fanning out around his eyes. “You put up with me on a near daily basis.”
The doctor chuckles, but I barely hear him. Rowan’s voice is all I can focus on.
“Tell me what you felt when you saw the altar for the first time,” he says.
Another stitch. Another sharp pull. I whimper, but Rowan’s fingers caressing mine are the perfect distraction.
“Like I was both someplace new and someplace familiar. Like it was where I’d been before, and where I was meant to be.”
“I felt the same way,” he says softly. Then he leans in closer, his lips brushing against the sensitive shell of my ear. “I felt like you were the person I was supposed to be there with. Because deep down, some part of me knew you were meant to be mine.”
The words send a shiver down my spine. The doctor works in silence for a moment, but I don’t notice the pain as much. Not when Rowan’s thumb keeps sweeping over my skin, not when he’s whispering such…delicious things in my ear. Things that I want so badly to be true.
“You’re almost done,” he says. “Just a few more.”
I nod, biting my lip. The needle pricks again, but I don’t look away from him.
“That’s it,” he murmurs. “You’re so brave. So perfect.”
I melt. At least, my insides do. I’m turning into a puddle of mush at his words.
The last stitch tugs at my skin. “All done,” says the doctor, and I exhale, letting all the tension out of my body.
Rowan presses a kiss to my forehead. “You did it, sweetheart.” My stomach flutters at his words.
“Watch for redness, swelling, or fever,” the doctor says, snapping off his gloves. “Keep it dry for at least 24 hours, and just wash around it with clean water for the first couple of days. You can take paracetamol for the pain if needed. Come back in a week to get the stitches removed.”
Rowan nods, absorbing all of this. “Thank you.”
