“How do two women…” Her mom’s brow furrowed, and she waved her hand in front of her face, cheeks blooming pink. “Never mind. I don’t need to know the details.”
“Mami!” Jules couldn’t contain her laughter. “Use your imagination. It’s mostly the same as with a man, except neither of us has a penis.”
Paula threw her head back with a laugh. “That belongs on a greeting card. Okay, so what happened with Sophie? You broke up?”
“She’s taken a new job working at a theater in Syracuse, so we decided it would be easier to end things now, before we got any more serious.”
“A long-distance relationship wasn’t a possibility?”
Jules lifted one shoulder half-heartedly. “Realistically, no. It’s about a five-hour drive, and between her schedule and mine, when would we ever see each other? Theater schedules are demanding. We only get one night off a week, and I’m usually so exhausted—like today—I can’t imagine trying to get to Syracuse and back before I go on stage tomorrow.”
“That does seem hard,” her mom agreed. “But I also know that I made it work with your father for five years while you were in school here in New York and he was back in Florida with your brothers.”
“But you guys had been together almost twenty years already when you did that. You were married with children, and you knew you’d be together again once I graduated from high school. Sophie and I only dated for a few weeks, and if both of our careers work out the way we want them to, I’ll always be here in the city, and she’ll always be in Syracuse.”
“Okay.” Her mom sighed in defeat. “That does sound pretty impossible.”
“It is,” Jules agreed glumly. “But I still can’t be sad for the time we spent together or the way she helped me embrace my sexuality.”
“That’s my girl, always looking on the bright side,” her mom said.
“How do you think Rob and Alex will react?” she asked, voicing the fear that had been rising inside her since she’d gotten over the initial euphoria of her mother’s acceptance. “And Abuelita?”
“I think the boys will take it in stride, and if they don’t, I’ll make them wish they had,” she said with the kind of look she’d used in their childhood right before doling out a particularly brutal punishment. “And yourabuelitamay surprise you. You know her friend Alfonso? The one everyone jokingly calls hernovio?”
“Of course,” Jules said. Her grandmother had been attending church and other functions with her “boyfriend” Alfonso for over a decade, since Jules’s grandfather passed away. Everyone in the family had been waiting for them to make their relationship official, but they both always waved it off and said they were happy as they were.
“Do you know why they play coy about their relationship?” her mom asked.
“I’m guessing I don’t,” Jules said.
“He’s gay,” Paula said. “He’s in love with a man, but I guess these things are harder at his age, so he puts on a show with yourabuela, and they let people think they’re dating.”
“Whoa,” Jules said. “And she knows this?”
“Oh, yes,” Paula confirmed. “She knows. She and Alfonso have been friends since they were kids, when they both came here from Cuba.”
“I had no idea.”
“We’ve both learned a lot this morning, haven’t we?” Paula said.
“We sure have,” Jules agreed. “Now can we talk about gettingyouon a date?”
“No. No way,” her mom protested, but soon enough, they were swiping through profiles on her phone, giggling as they critiqued Paula’s potential suitors.
Jules and her mom spent the rest of the morning in her apartment. It was something she had always treasured about their relationship, the way they could pass seemingly endless hours talking about anything and everything. Paula had so many questions about her sexuality, and Jules was relieved to be able to share it all with her.
They went out to lunch together and then to a movie, wanting to soak in all the mother-daughter time they had today, although Jules was too exhausted to do much more than that. She needed to conserve her energy for the week ahead. At least her stomach had finally recovered. Coming out to her mother had been an immediate cure, confirming her suspicion that it was her own conscience all along. Damn that Catholic guilt.
If only she’d been able to sort herself out in time to introduce Sophie to her mom the way she’d wanted to, as her girlfriend…
On Tuesday, she slept in again and had lunch with her mom before she headed to the airport to fly home. She’d be back in a few weeks for their official opening night, and Jules already couldn’t wait to see her again.
When she got to the theater that evening, she almost closed the door to her dressing room, feeling an uncharacteristic urge to be alone. Or maybe it was a desire to avoid Sophie, not that she didn’t want to see her. On the contrary, she wanted her more than ever. But seeing her in passing, pretending she wasn’t helplessly in love with her…it was torture.
Jules left her door open.
And when she looked up from her phone a few minutes later and saw Sophie standing in the doorway, she couldn’t help the way her heart leaped, no matter how foolish it was.
