“He…he sent you away?” Jessica stiffened. Her dad had sabotaged her relationship with Mark all those years ago?
“No.” Mark settled his gaze on the stream below them again. “He didn’t tell me to break up with you when I enlisted. That was all me. In fact, he was really pissed at me for hurting you like I did. He was…well, I guess he was being a father figure to me, Jess. He saw me headed down a bad path, and he showed me a way to straighten myself out. I owe him a lot for that.”
“Oh.” Her anger faded into gratitude for her dad, even if his actions had ultimately resulted in her very first broken heart.
Mark was quiet for a few minutes, and they just sat there, side by side. The enormity of it…of what he’d been through…it made her heart ache. For him, living it? She couldn’t imagine.
“When Sharlene came to town this fall, it shook me up,” he said, his voice low and gruff. “I didn’t know how to handle it so I just shut down, shut her out, tried to pretend it wasn’t happening. And I guess I shut you out too. I never meant to lie to you.”
She swallowed hard. “Okay.”
“All I can say is that I never made a conscious decision not to tell you. I was just so determined not to let Sharlene back into my life, not to even think about her. It was easier for me, I guess, just to not talk about it. To anyone.”
“I understand.” And she appreciated his honesty, even if it still ripped her to pieces that he hadn’t shared the truth with her back when it happened.
“And when she left again, when she left me another fucking note, I just…” He shrugged, his body gone stiff with tension.
“She hurt you all over again,” she whispered.Oh Mark…
“Stupid, right?” He sounded so tough, but she heard his pain.
“Not stupid at all. You’re human. Of course it hurt when she left again.”
“So I just blocked it all out and tried to forget.”
“Mark, when was this?”Please tell me it was before we started sleeping together…
“It was after the meteor shower.” He said it in a monotone. “I know I should have told you. I’m sorry. I truly am.”
Tears welled in her eyes. “How many times did you see her before that?”
“Two. Three maybe. It wasn’t like we were hanging out. She came by a couple of times, asking for another chance. I shut her out, told her to leave me alone. That’s all it was.”
“Mark, why didn’t you tell me any of this when I asked you about it last week?” That was what she still couldn’t understand. Why had he walked away when she’d asked him for the truth? Because she would have forgiven him, dammit, and now…
“I don’t know.” His eyes had taken on that faraway look again, like they had that night at the spa right before he walked away.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“I called her last night,” he said.
“Called who?”
“Sharlene. We’re going to set up a time to meet…talk.”
“Wow, that’s…that’s huge, Mark.” She reached out and squeezed his hand. “What made you decide to call her?”
A hint of a smile touched his lips. “I had a little help. And I realized I couldn’t ask you for another chance if I wasn’t willing to do the same for Sharlene.”
Was he asking for another chance?Her heart lurched into her throat. But if she gave him another chance, he’d just shut her out again. He’d walk away when things got tough. “I hope it goes well.”
He shrugged.
“I really appreciate your honesty,” she told him. “And I’m so, so sorry for everything you’ve been through.”
“But some things can’t be forgiven. I know that better than anyone.” He kept his eyes straight ahead.
Dammit.“I do forgive you, Mark. You never meant to hurt me. I know that.”
