I leaned my head on his shoulder and wiped my tears. “You wanted your parents to meet me? Damn, Andrew. That perfect life has shattered in a million pieces all around me. I’m not some cute coed that they’re going to be excited about their shiny son dating.”
“But I was going to tell them all that. Why wouldn’t you let me?”
I bit my lip and looked down at my shoe. “You know why,” I whispered.
He pulled back and looked at me. “Gray, come on. Don’t do this.”
I shrugged, my eyes filling again. “Andrew, your mom. You’re her perfect son.…” I couldn’t help but think of my perfect son.
He turned toward me. “So, do you love me?”
I bit my lip again and turned to look out over the water. “It isn’t that simple.”
“But why isn’t it?”
“Because you know it isn’t, Andrew.”
“But do you?”
I sighed. “Of course I do. You know I do. Do you think I want to do this? You have filled up that deep, dark, empty space where my son is gone every other week. You have made me feel beautiful and wanted when my husband tossed me out like yesterday’s newspaper. Do you think I want that to be over?”
He stepped toward me and kissed me. “So don’t let it,” he whispered. “Let’s just tell them. They loved you, and they won’t care.”
“They will care. They will think I’m preying on their son.”
“Gray, I know you think you’re fine, but for you to even think all those things shows me how badly all of this messed you up. You areeverythingthat anyone could ever want. You’re the only one who can’t see that.”
I smiled sadly, shaking my head. “It doesn’t matter,” I whispered.
I could see tears starting to form in his eyes, and I felt like the devil incarnate.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” I said.
“But you’re breaking up with me anyway.”
I nodded slowly.
He slapped his hand on the hood of my car. “Damn, Gray. I don’t get why you would do this.”
“Yes, you do,” I said.
He hugged me, and I could feel his tears falling onto my bare shoulder.
“Hey,” I said, lifting his head. “We might be breaking up, but I’m not the kind of woman who would deny a guy the chance to check something major off of his bucket list.”
He wiped his eyes and brightened. “Really?”
I shrugged. “Yeah. I can’t think of a better way to say good-bye.”
“You can stop being my girlfriend, Gray. I don’t have a choice in that.” He paused and wiped his eyes. “But there’s no way I’m letting you say good-bye.”
diana: a secret
My life was finally back on track. Things with Frank were going great. We had had an amazing few weeks together. He’d even asked me to move in with him, and while a part of me wanted to, I knew it was too fast. I wasn’t ready yet. I didn’t think Gray was ready yet either.
When I’d show up in the morning, smiling and whistling, not even complaining about all the healthy stuff she made me cook, she’d give me a sideways smile and tease me. Then I’d laugh, and we’d talk, and I wasn’t ready for all that to be over.
But this morning when I walked over from the guesthouse, she was in the kitchen looking like she hadn’t slept all night. I knew she was having a real hard time being apart from Andrew, and even worse, with him gone she had all kinds of time to realize that her kid was somewhere else every other week.
