“Oh, Mom, she is so, so cute,” Vivi said to Caroline, hugging the little white goat with brown spots. She nuzzled into Vivi with a brown ear. “Let’s call her Ellie Mae.”
“Ellie Mae?” I asked. “Wow. A few months in the South, and you are really owning it.”
Vivi was leading her new pet/lawn mower into the yard, pausing to pat her head. Ellie Mae jumped in the air like she was just so excited. She really was adorable. But as soon as she entered the gate, the goat simultaneously ate one of Caroline’s prized roses and pooped.
“Swell,” Caroline said. “The house is yours now, Sloane, as long as you keep the goat.”
We all laughed. Five hours later, we were all laughing again, this time around Mom’s dining-room table. She had made Grammy’s favorite dinner: tea service. We had cucumber, egg salad, and tomato sandwiches, brownies, lemon squares, and, of course, tea. Mom said it was all gluten-free for Caroline, but quite frankly, I had my doubts. Still, it was a perfect summer supper, light and easy and reminiscent of a simpler time.
We talked—deliciously, gloriously—about absolutely nothing of importance. None of the major issues we were tackling in our lives was at this dinner with us. I knew in the back of my mind that it would be a good time to share with my mom what was going on with my health while my sisters were there to soften the blow. But I didn’t want to ruin our drama-free event.
Mom took a deep breath, and we all leaned in, somehow sensing that what she was about to say was going to be important.
But before she could speak, Caroline interjected, “I’m packing up, Mom. The guesthouse is officially all yours again.”
The way she said it felt abrupt, even for Caroline. I got the distinct impression that she was trying to change the subject, despite the fact that a subject hadn’t even been broached.
“No!” Mom said. “I don’t want the guesthouse to be all mine again. You can’t leave!”
“Mom!” Caroline was incredulous. “Surely you didn’t think we were going to stay here forever?”
“No. Not forever. But it’s still summer. There’s still a wedding to plan.”
“I’m only going back for two weeks. Then I’ll be back here for a bit. But the last time I came, I moved. I have parkas crammed in the closet. It’s time to get out of here and reboot.”
Now Mom was crying in earnest. “But when you come back, you’ll be staying atyourhouse, and it won’t be the same.”
I think we were all a bit surprised by the display of emotion. You didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to figure out that Mom had been thrown by the idea that we would all be coming home to live with her, all at once. I didn’t blame her, really. When you were by yourself, it was easy to get into your routine, become set in your ways. Seven of us suddenly living under her roof and James down the street had to have come as quite the shock. I’d assumed she would be relieved to see that her nest was shrinking.
I was crying now, too, because if anyone cries, I cry with them. That had been a big hurdle for me to overcome as an actress, because I even responded compassionately to fellow actors’ fake tears.
“This really has been the best few months,” I said, sobbing, which was totally ridiculous, because Adam had been missing and James had cheated and Grammy had died and I had been sick that whole time.
I looked over and was surprised to see that Sloane was crying now, too.
“Here’s the deal, though. I have a surprise for all of you, and I need you to come to Manhattan on July 29 to get it.”
“What kind of surprise?” Sloane asked warily, drying her tears with her napkin.
“It’s a good one, I promise,” Caroline said. “I’ve been working really hard on it, and I think you’re all going to love it.”
Sloane crossed her arms, and I expected an argument from her, but none came. It had taken everything we had to get her to New York a few months ago. Before that trip, she hadn’t been on a plane or in the city since Dad was killed in the 9/11 attacks. But now she seemed resigned. With Caroline, it was just easier that way.
I was excited about going to New York and excited about a surprise of any kind. But I was not excited about my sister leaving. I started sobbing again.
“You guys,” Caroline said, “I’m not dying. Let’s get it together.”
More sobbing.
We heard heavy footsteps on the front stairs. James appeared in the doorway, in a suit as always, looking—I had to admit—irresistibly handsome. He looked at Caroline, then me, then Sloane, then Mom. He inhaled as though he were going to say something and then turned and bolted back down the steps.
It was the best thing that could have possibly happened, because just like that, we all burst out laughing.
Mom stood up and motioned for us all to come to her. I wrapped one arm around her and one around Caroline, resting my head on my mom’s shoulder. Even though I hadn’t told her about any of the things that were bothering me, still, at twenty-six years old, there was nothing more soothing than my mother’s hug.
There we were: one mother, three daughters, a lot of tears, a lot of laughter. I knew then that no matter where life took us next, no matter what the future held, these women and this hug would always, always be worth coming home to.
ELEVEN
