Kash chuckled and shifted closer. He’d been having a long string of good days, so his body was moving easier than it had been in recent months. But he tended to do better in winter than in hot, humid summers. “Shoot, kid.”
Gage took a breath, then swallowed heavily. “I’m seeing someone. We’re practically living together, and I want to bringhim around, but there’s…it’s…” He didn’t know how to say all of this.
“Do you think everyone won’t like him?”
Gage laughed. “Oh no. Everyone is going to love him. It’s Frankie’s brother. Fallon? The photographer?”
“The one who covered me in paint?” Adele asked, striding over.
“Eavesdropping isn’t cute,” Gage said, folding his arms.
Adele ignored him and dropped beside his husband, throwing an arm around Kash while Bowen took the chair across from them. “I liked that kid. Well, I hated the paint, but he has a good eye.”
“He has a great eye for a lot of things,” Gage said slowly. “And I like him. A lot. Like…more than I expected to.”
Adele leaned toward him slightly. “And you’re feeling okay with dating?”
“Yeah. Yes.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s not about any of that. It’s more that, uh…well. He’s…” He didn’t know what he was supposed to say, but the truth was, people would notice. And even if they didn’t know, they’d eventually notice when there was a baby. “So the thing is, he’s having a baby. It was unexpected. Not, you know, planned or whatever. But it is what it is, and I don’t want y’all to be weird about it.”
Adele stared at him. “So his ex is cool with you two doing a parenting thing?”
Right. Fuck. They didn’t know. “No. Like…he’s carrying the baby.”
Adele stared. “What do you meanhe’scarrying the baby?”
“I mean—” Gage started, but Kash held up a hand, then leaned over and murmured into Adele’s ear.
Adele’s whole face turned red. “Oh. I didn’t know he was…right. Okay.”
“You’re such a dipshit,” Bowen said. “I got it right away.”
Adele flipped him off. “So, the other parent—are they around?”
Gage bit his lip, then shook his head. “You know him. Charlie.”
Blinking, Adele frowned before his eyes went wide. “Wait! That’s…oh my God. The fucker who hit Lucas? The one who—Jesus Christ, how did this all happen?”
“See, now that’s what I mean,” Gage said. “You can’t just ask that shit. It’s personal, okay? The point is, Charlie isn’t around. He doesn’t know. Fallon doesn’t really want to talk about carrying a baby because he’s trying to manage his dysphoria and everything else while also wanting to be a dad. So if I bring him around, y’all can’t be weird. You can’t fawn over him and turn a dinner into a fucking baby shower or anything.”
Adele sank back into his chair, and he looked hurt. “Gage. Do you really think I’d do something like that?”
“I—” He stopped. The truth was, no. He didn’t. But the one thing his assault had done to him was warp his ability to trust people. Even the ones he loved most. And that made him angry all over again. He swallowed heavily. “I’m protective over him. I’m sorry, but also, I’m not. I want to bring him around and let him be loved by everyone, but this situation isn’t, you know, normal.”
“Hey, kid,” Bowen said, leaning forward, “he’s going to be as welcome here as anyone ever has been. But can I ask you an uncomfortable question?”
Gage braced himself. “Might as well.”
Bowen didn’t look apologetic at all. “What about you? I mean, clearly, you’re in this because you like him. Or love him, I don’t know. But I think we need to know you’re okay with the whole baby thing because you went through a lot.”
Gage didn’t know what to say.
“I think what your uncle is trying to explain,” Kash said, “is that we’re worried about you.”
Everyone was always so fucking worried about him. And maybe they were right to, but it felt like shit. It felt…heavy. Like they all thought he was weak and fragile. Or that he was incapable of knowing and understanding what he wanted.
Like he couldn’t separate what had happened to him from the things he wanted.
Not everything was a trauma response, and he wasn’t sure they understood all that.
