I thought I’d prefer a clean-shaven Daddy, but still—
“Um, he looks okay?” I said, just to be nice.
“We should go meet him,” Sam said, instantly turning my stomach into a tight ball of roiling nerves.
I’d come here specifically because Daryl had told me to, so meeting Daddies was… was the wholepoint, but now that it was about to actually happen, the thought of it all—putting myself out there to see if they liked me and trying to be cute or playful or anything other than the uncomfortable, awkward mess I always was around new people—it all sounded like too much.
Sam was looking at me expectantly.
I shook my head. “I don’t want to,” I said, even though the bearded Daddy Sam had pointed out was attractive and had a nice smile and looked like he’d take good care of a boy if he had one.
“Are you sure?” Sam asked, his brow furrowing. “He’s hot, right?”
I guessed he was, but he wasn’t Edward, and suddenly I didn’t care how clingy it was, I just wantedhim. Or, if he was busy all day, I at least wanted to be back in his hotel room, not here, surrounded by bouncy houses and bubbly Littles and Daddies who would probably see right through me and realize I’d never belong.
It was okay if Edward didn’t actually have time for me. I wouldn’t mind curling up on Edward’s bed with Teddy and my Kindle until he got done with whatever it was he was doing.
But… but even that was dumb. I had no reason to think he’d want to find me there when he got finished with whatever work he had here in Asheville. He might begladI was gone right now, since he’d never intended to get stuck with a roommate anyway. He might be hoping to find the room empty when he was done for the day, so he could relax without me being in his space. Or he might not come back to the room at all. He might have friends here in Asheville to hang out with, or—my stomach suddenly turned to lead—now that he’d finally taken off his wedding ring, he might want to get out and meet people for other reasons, too.
I blinked fast, my eyes suddenly stinging, and desperately tried to think of something else,anythingelse other than Edward leaving me alone in the hotel room tonight so he could go do… that. He might, though. Just because he hadn’t reacted tomyreaction to him earlier—and there was no way at all that he hadn’t noticed how tented my pajama pants were—that didn’t mean he wouldn’t want to go find some relief somewhere else.
Withsomeone else.
Someone who wasn’t me.
“Oh, darn it,” Sam said. “You can’t have him anyway.”
I flinched, pressing a hand against my stomach. “I can’t?”
I meant, of course I couldn’t. Knowing it didn’t make it any easier to hear Sam put it so bluntly like that and all, though.
Sam’s forehead crinkled. “Um, no? Look. I think that blond boy is with him, so I guess it’s a good thing you aren’t interested in that one.”
Oh. He meant the bearded Daddy he’d pointed out earlier, not Edward.
“That’s okay,” I said, trying to smile. “I’m—”
“Don’tsay you’re holding out for Stockholm Daddy,” Sam interrupted fiercely, hands on his hips.
“I wasn’t going to,” I said, which was true. There was no holding out when Edward didn’t even want to be a Daddy… or wantme.
“Good,” Sam said with a sharp nod. Then he grinned. “So let’s find you—”
“No,” I interrupted, even though it was rude. “I mean, I’m… I’m supposed to be meeting someone here, remember? Daryl.”
Sam rolled his eyes, then made a gagging gesture. “Ew, no.”
“Sam, I have to at least meet him,” I said, rubbing my still-sweating hands against my shorts as I let my eyes roam over all the people. “He invited me here.”
And at least he’d sounded willing to try to be my Daddy. Temporarily.
Sam’s hands were back on his hips. “So?” he challenged me, looking so fierce I almost smiled.
“So… it would be rude not to?”
“Well,Ithink it was pretty rude of him to leave youhanginglast night, Rene! You don’t owe that Daryl person anything. I’m not even sure he’s a real Daddy! Not everyone who checks that box on their Cuffd profile counts, you know.”
But just then, I saw him. I knew it was Daryl, because he looked just like his pictures. I guessed he hadn’t needed to filter or airbrush them, since he was so attractive anyway… except that now, finally seeing him in real life, his good looks didn’t actually look all that good to me. Even from a distance, I could tell that his eyes weren’t warm like Edward’s. They were more flinty and calculating… and they were locked right onto me.
