This wasn’t on him, though. It was my failure. I hadn’t made it clear that I meant he could count on me outside our room, too.
That I’d meant “yes,” not just for last night and this morning, but for as long as he’d have me.
That I wanted me being there for him to become a permanent condition.
Although, as I raced out to my truck, I realized with a curse that that wasn’t the only thing I’d failed at. I’d also failed to exchange phone numbers with him, and now, not only did I have no idea where he’d gone, but I had no way to tell him I was coming for him, either.
I was, though.
I’d always come for him.
And if I was overreacting, I’d apologize and back off… but I’d seen the anxiety brewing in those summer-storm eyes of his, and I knew down to my bones that I wasn’t.
Rene needed me, and I’d be there for him.
Full stop.
12
Rene
It would have beenbeyond rude to ignore Daryl’s message, but if Edward had come back for me, I may have done it anyway. Not because I didn’t want to meet Daryl—well, a little bit that, since it was already hard to imagine any other Daddy comparing to Edward—but mostly because of how panicky I felt about the part of his message that had told me to show up at the Cuffd park day in “something sexy.”
I may not have had the best track record of success with sex and dating and all that stuff, but I wasn’t a prude. It was just that I was pretty sure I hadn’t packed anything that would qualify as “sexy.” It wasn’t really part of my standard wardrobe, and looking sexy hadn’t been something I’d pictured when I’d been reading about what it meant to be a Little and have a Daddy.
Not that I didn’t realize some Daddies had sex with their Littles.
Not that I didn’twantto do that with a Daddy… in theory.
I sucked my lower lip into my mouth and worried it between my teeth, admitting the truth to myself: I just wasn’t all that sure I wanted to do it with anyone except—
Well, I wasn’t sure I wanted to do it with Daryl.
“Hey, today is going to be fun!” Sam said, slinging his arm around my shoulders as we entered the park. “What are you so worried about?”
“Nothing,” I said quickly, not wanting to spoil the day for him. But Sam just made a silly, rude noise that made me smile, so I confessed, “You’re right. Maybe I am? It’s just… do you think I’m dressed okay?”
“Yes,” he said promptly, his grin so sunny and bright that I almost believed him.
But then I looked down at the simple T-shirt and shorts Edward had picked out for me that morning. Theywere“okay,” even if they weren’t as cute as what most of the other boys at breakfast had been dressed in, but that just meant I’d asked Sam the wrong question. What I’d meant was did I look sexy—which I didn’t—since that was what Daryl’s message had said.
If hewasgoing to be my Daddy, even a temporary one just for the weekend, shouldn’t I do what he said? I’d figured I’d want to, and I’d been right about how nice it felt to have someone else in charge like that—at least, when that someone had been Edward—but the closer it got to actually meeting Daryl in person, the more it made my stomach tighten up with nerves. The bad kind this time, not the excited kind I’d almost made myself sick with when he’d first told me I should try and make it to Asheville this weekend.
Sam suddenly tugged on the hem of my shirt, then smoothed his hands over the chest, straightening it out. “Seriously, Rene, you look totally fine,” he said earnestly. “You’re so pretty, you know? It doesn’t even matter what you wear. The Daddies will be all over you. Besides, you’re not—”
He bit his lip without finishing, his pale skin turning bright red.
“I’m not what?” I asked, suddenly nervous to find out what he’d found me wanting about.
“I mean, you just don’t seem like the type to wear things that are, um, super playful?”
My heart sank. He could tell, couldn’t he? I didn’t know how to be a Little, and the idea of trying to get excited about cartoons and learning how to color and not feel awkward during a “playdate” sounded… well, it all sounded really stressful, not relaxing like the blogs had all made it out to be.
“Hey,” Sam said, suddenly hugging me tight for no reason at all. “I’m sorry! You can borrow my Princess Celestia T-shirt when we get back to the Plum, if you want.”
“Thanks,” I said once he finally let go of me, even though I didn’t know who Princess Celestia even was. It was still nice of him. “I probably should have bought something new to wear for this weekend, though.”
Sam rolled his eyes dramatically, but not in a mean way. I was pretty sure Sam didn’t have a mean bone in his body.
