“Um, I’m right here,” Cheddar says. “There was no dragging involved.”
“Look, River,” Kit continues. “I’m not going to drop you in it if you decide to carry on with this nonsense, but I’m also not getting involved. I need to keep my nose clean. I can’t afford any of my shore leave being stripped off me. Not with the baby so close. I just ask you to think about the ramifications this idea will have on the rest of us.”
18
Cleo
Something is off. Theatmosphere is thick as butter as I step into River’s cabin, which is weird because she’s the only one in here. It’s like I can feel the weight of something hanging in the air.
River hasn’t noticed me yet, and I’m glad because I want to observe her for a moment longer. Her posture is almost rigid, and yet there is a slumped quality to the stature of her shoulders. It’s a bizarre contrast, and one I’m curious to understand.
What could have possibly happened between our date ending and now?
Fuck, she said she wanted to tell Kit and Boot about us. Did she do it?
“River?”
She jumps slightly and turns around. Her eyes have dark patches underneath them, and her hair is a fraction off of her usual perfected slicked back bun. She’s not a mess, but I can see through the starched uniform, and what I see is a woman unravelling. Something bad happened.
“River, what’s wrong?”
Like a steel shutter rolling down, she shuts her emotions away.
“Good morning,” she replies with a false, upbeat attitude. “Did you sleep well?”
Okay, I’ll play along for now. I still don’t know her well enough to figure out how to handle this version of River. “I did, thank you. Are your bunkies already on shift?”
A shadow of something passes across her face. “No, they’re just grabbing some scran. They’ll be back shortly.”
“Excellent. I’d like to talk to all of you, if that’s okay?”
“Sure.”
This is painful. I need to get her out of here for a few minutes and find out what the hell is going on. “Would you mind escorting me to the dining hall? I haven’t had any breakfast yet.”
I was far too wired this morning to eat. I woke up feeling refreshed and ready to work. My instincts are pullingme like a divining rod, because I know there is a meaty story hiding on this ship, waiting for me to coax it out, and it has nothing to do with recruitment.
Placing her beret on, River smooths down her uniform, which I can see is her way of giving herself a few extra seconds to compose herself.
“After you,” she says politely.
Her behaviour is throwing me off completely. After last night, I expected a few cheeky comments or lingering looks, but that’s not the case at all. If anything, she’s pulling away from me.
We make our way to the dining hall, which is buzzing with chatter. I see Cheddar, Kit, and Boot at a table. There doesn’t seem to be a conversation flowing, and as we walk a little closer, I can see they have the same exhausted look on their faces as River.
Kit looks up and spots us. I see her eyes widen a fraction and then her face pale. Her eyes drop to her plate and don’t move. Now, either her bacon is suddenly the most interesting thing on the ship, or she’s avoiding River.
I believe my assumption that the bunkies have had a falling out is spot on. Unfortunately, I think I’m at the centre of their disagreement, which I don’t like at all.
My presence on board was supposed to be non-invasive, not tearing friends apart. But here we are—River’s best friends are clearly upset with her, and it’s because of me. Because of us.
The guilt sits heavy in my stomach.
We each grab a plate and walk the line of hot plates. I settle for scrambled eggs on toast, whereas River has a Full English. Expecting us to head over to her friends, I’m more than surprised when River picks the closest table and sits down.
I wait until we’re both eating before I broach the issues. “River, what happened last night?” I keep my voice low because neither of us wants any eavesdroppers.
“Nothing,” she mumbles, looking at her plate and decidedly not at me.
