I break free before I can answer her and wave to Ryan as he walks up. When he smiles, he looks like I remember him in college, although that can’t be true. We’ve all aged as we’ve raced through life. His blue eyes still sparkle, but his thick brown hair has a dusting of gray at the temple, the only sign of age. I give him a genuine smile and know my dimple is showing. I’m surprised to realize I’ve missed him.
“Welcome, Celeste! Great to see you, Beth; it’s been far too long,” Ryan says as he gives each of us a hug. “Let’s grab yourthings and get you both settled.” As I pop the trunk with my remote and walk to my car, he follows close behind. “I wasn’t sure you’d accept the invitation, truth be told.”
“And miss the chance to celebrate my only daughter’s engagement? What kind of mom do you think I am?” I say.
“It wasn’t the party I thought you might object to. It was, well, the location,” he says.
I look at him, his kind eyes, and sigh. “You’re right. I won’t pretend it’s easy to be back here in the desert, but this weekend isn’t about me. It’s about Celeste and Zach.”
Ryan perks up. “That’s the spirit. And I really do think you’ll love this place once you see what I’ve done with it. The renovation has been a labor of love, a tribute to the past, so to speak,” he says. “Glad you both are here.”
I look at his face, about to remind him that I’ve never been comfortable about visiting the desert again, that I’m only here because of Celeste. But there’s something in his eyes—some blend of sorrow and understanding—that makes me turn and look toward Gentry House again. Only glimpses of the rooftop are visible through the thick landscaping. I’m dizzy and stumble into the side of the car. Ryan grabs my hand to steady me. I feel his stare. He’s watching me closely. I stare back at the pathway and notice the towering palm trees cast playful shadows over a mosaic-tiled pathway leading to the grand entrance of the house in the distance. And then I know where I am. My mouth drops open.
“Is this the Desert Sunrise?” I ask, dreading his answer. “How? Why would you do this?”
“No, of course not! That old place was torn down years ago. This was built in the same era, so there are similarities, of course,” Ryan says. “The architecture of the 1920s is quite specific to the desert, so many of these places look similar, with common amenities and features. I wanted to embrace that era and save one of these grande dames. And I have.”
He touches my shoulder as I fight to gain my equilibrium. I haven’t stepped foot inside their house, and still the terror has begun. “I don’t know if I can stay.”
“Don’t say that. You’ve never been here, Beth. Gentry House has been completely refurbished. You’ll love it here. I bought this place to save it from being torn down like the Desert Sunrise was and like so many of these homes have been. People don’t respect the past anymore, not like I do at least. I couldn’t let another demolition happen, not to another one of these historic properties,” he says. “It’s as simple as that. You’re safe here. I promise.”
I take my hand away from his and fold my arms across my chest. Nothing is simple, not anymore. Maybe never. I don’t feel safe either. I take a deep breath.
“OK, let me think,” I say and kick the toe of my tennis shoes into the gravel driveway. I need to calm down. I feel Celeste and Roxy watching me from the other side of the car. I remind myself we are only here because of my daughter. She made the mistake of falling in love with Ryan and Roxy’s son. Fate. Ugh.
“Look, Beth, I didn’t know Roxy was going to host the engagement party here. I swear. She planned it all and sent theinvitations. She’s never even been out here until now. I assumed we’d have the party in Newport Beach, at our home,” Ryan says. “When I did finally see the invitation, I thought about calling you to warn you that our second home may seem familiar, but I didn’t think you’d come if I did. And you need to be here. For Celeste.”
My head is spinning. But I’m here, we’re here, and I know I must stay. “OK. Fine. For Celeste and Zach, I’ll stay,” I say. “This weekend is about them, not me.”
“Exactly,” Ryan says. “The future, not the past. For all of us.”
“What’s the holdup, you two?” Roxy asks, joining us. “We’ll all get heat stroke standing around out here in the middle of the day. We should get inside to the air-conditioning. I have a welcome drink waiting.” Roxy strolls off toward the house, fashionable wedges crunching in the gravel.
It’s too late to turn around. Celeste has already disappeared, no doubt looking for Zach. I wonder briefly why Zach didn’t come out to greet us. And then I see them—Celeste and Zach sharing a hug and kiss in the shade by the pink bougainvillea. Reunited young lovers need their alone time. I get it.
“Come on, Beth,” Ryan says as he grabs our bags and slams the trunk closed. “You’ll be fine. This is a completely different location. You’ve never been here before.” He smiles and touches my shoulder, but something about the glint in his eye makes me question him. He doesn’t seem like the same guy I knew back in college. Something has changed.
“Beth?” he whispers in my ear, sending a chill down my spine. “Celeste and Zach will meet us inside. Let’s go.”
“OK, I’m coming,” I say, stepping away from him. With no real choice in the matter, I follow him down the winding path, wondering what exactly I’m getting into this weekend.
I am not fine, I realize, as goose bumps dot my arms. Despite Ryan’s assurances that this is a different place, and I guess it is, the déjà vu is dizzying and disconcerting. I follow him up the walkway to the estate, a meandering pathway adorned with vibrant desert flora toward an ornate wrought iron gate. The gate, intricately designed with art deco motifs, opens to reveal a meticulously landscaped courtyard. We climb a couple of terra-cotta steps to reach the front door, an artful masterpiece itself, with carved wooden details and stained-glass panels that reflect the hues of the desert sun. A pair of antique lanterns flank the door. The air is scented with the delicate fragrance of the pink bougainvillea, creating an enchanting welcome.
It’s all quite lovely. Just like the Desert Sunrise hotel was twenty-five years ago. God, what am I doing here?
Ryan stops and turns around. “It’s OK, Beth you’ll see. We’ll make new, good memories, for Celeste and Zach. I love it here. And you will too.”
Ryan is waiting for an answer, his hand on the brass doorknob.
“OK,” I say, taking a deep breath. “I’ll be fine.”
Ryan smiles in relief but then looks over my head, eyes darkening, and says, “We have more company.”
4
Jamie
I look over at Greer, who is driving my white Volvo too fast, and shake my head.
