As much as she didn’t want to hurt him, the best thing was to sever their relationship before it had time to grow. She couldn’t give in to her desire to be with him. Instead, she needed to pour all her time and energy into T.W., watching over him and taking care of him…the way she should have been watching over him and taking care of him all along.
That was the problem. She’d failed T.W., and she’d never failed a patient before.
She’d been so focused on Tyler those last days before the intestinal obstruction that she hadn’t kept a close enough eye on T.W. She should have seen the oncoming pain, should have paid attention to the soreness he’d been experiencing, should have been more aware of his changing condition.
After striving so hard to be the best nurse that Premier had on staff, she’d only proven herself to be the most easily swayed by a handsome man. Of course, there was nothing wrong with her taking a day off. It was true that a person who practiced self-care had an easier time taking care of someone else, and that applied to nurses even more.
But she’d broken her personal rule not to get involved with a client’s family. She shouldn’t have allowed herself to care about Tyler, and she shouldn’t have let T.W. persuade her to go out and spend an entire day with Tyler. They most certainly shouldn’t have been together in the hot spring so long.
The stupidest thing of all had been initiating the kiss. In hindsight, she wasn’t sure what had come over her or why she’d thought for even a second that kissing Tyler McQuaid was a good idea. Kissing him had been like touching burning hot flames. And she’d felt seared all the way through ever since.
The truth was, if they hadn’t been kissing in the hot spring, maybe they would have checked their phones sooner and realized something was wrong. At the very least, after the long day away, they should have gone back to the house, and she should have checked on T.W.
The rational side of her brain told her that even if they’d known what was going on, they wouldn’t have been able to do anything at the house, and they would have had to fly T.W. to the emergency room anyway.
Even so, that didn’t stop her from berating herself for not catching the problem earlier. Ultimately, she’d proven that Tyler had been right…she wasn’t the best nurse for taking care of T.W.
She’d called her agency the first day at the hospital and informed Pippa she needed a replacement right away. Thankfully, Doreen, one of their most competent nurses and an older woman with years of experience, had just finished a position and agreed to travel to Colorado and take care of T.W.
Kinsey only felt a little guilty for making the switch without consulting T.W. or Tyler. After all, her time there was almost finished anyway. Now, with T.W.’s setback, he would benefitfrom having the nursing care a while longer, since he wouldn’t be strong enough to start chemotherapy for a few more weeks.
The delay was her fault. If the cancer spread even more and caused additional issues, she would blame only herself.
Her heart pinched, and she smoothed a hand over T.W.’s forehead. She’d grown to care about T.W. as she did most of her patients. But this time, the bond with him seemed deeper, and that scared her.
“Hey,” came Tyler’s soft greeting from the doorway—a greeting that was warm enough to turn her insides into gooey chocolate.
“Hi.” She began picking up the bedside table, avoiding looking in his direction, afraid that if she caught even a glimpse of him, she’d melt even more.
His footsteps padded into the room. “I thought you might want this.”
The aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air. “Thank you, Tyler. You’re so thoughtful.”
He drew closer until he was standing behind her.
“You can set it on the table.” She still didn’t let herself look at him and instead focused on organizing T.W.’s bottles of medicine.
Tyler had already been in to check on T.W. earlier, but because Leah had still been in the room, Kinsey had been able to avoid talking to Tyler directly.
But now…how long could she shuffle around the medicines without being insufferably rude?
He stepped closer, and his hand shot out and covered hers, bringing her fidgeting to a halt.
She stood unmoving, staring at his tanned hand against hers, the sinews and veins so strong, his fingers hard and calloused yet gentle. The muscles in his arm were rigid, and his bicep brushed against her.
His other arm wrapped around her so that he was holding the cup in front of her, a waft of steam filling her senses with the rich aroma of the coffee…and of him.
His warmth, his woodsy scent, his strength encompassed her so that her body was suddenly alert and alive and tuned in to him. He was boxing her in from behind, giving her no place to go, no escape from his presence. She could feel the rise and fall of his chest that was barely touching her back. She could hear the steady rhythm of his breathing. She could almost taste the deliciousness of his nearness.
She couldn’t let herself think about his deliciousness. But her rebellious mind went back to their kiss, to the crushing power of his lips, to the stark desire that had been in every move of his mouth.
There was no sense in denying it. She’d loved their kiss. She’d dreamed about their kiss. And she definitely wanted to repeat that kiss, even though she never would.
Releasing a tense breath, she took the coffee, needing for him to step back, needing to put a safe distance between them.
But instead of backing away, he lifted his free hand to her hair and brushed it away from her neck. With her hair still long and loose and not yet pulled back, his fingers skimmed the strands to one side, leaving a stretch of her neck and shoulder visible.
“Dad’s finally asleep?” Tyler whispered.
