“William, is that you?” The female voice has my spine going rigid.
“Fuck.” The last person I want to see is Meredith. Spurred by panic, I take Edwina’s hand in mine and pull her across the room to the hallway at the other end. The corridor is lined with doorless rooms, all filled with more grunts and groans, louder slaps of flesh, and the whimpers of aroused spectators. I drag Edwina quickly to the other side where we’re greeted by a blessedly cool breeze. Here, the lighting is even dimmer and the doorways are lined with sheer curtains.
We rush through one doorway onto a circular balcony, but the balustrade is occupied. A dryad with green leafy hair perches nude upon the rail, her head thrown back, her balance precarious, while her lover—a lizard fae, based on their green scaly skin—feasts between her open legs.
“Oooh!” Edwina says, startling the couple. The dryad almost loses her balance on the rail before she catches herself. “That’s so dangerous but so sexy!”
I drag her away as fast as I can. Thankfully, the next balcony is empty. Breathing slow and deep, I gather lungfuls of soothing air. As I reach the balustrade, I plant my forearms on the rail and let my head hang as I recover my composure. I’m so far from being William the Poet right now, it’s laughable.
The relative silence on the balcony calms my racing pulse. A light breeze muffles the sounds of pleasure coming from insidewhile music from downstairs gives me something else to focus on.
After a few moments, Edwina comes up beside me. She leans against the balustrade and assesses me with a furrowed brow. “Are you all right, William?”
Her gentle tone paired with the sound of my name—not Willy, not Mr. Haywood—eases me even further. Still, all I can manage is a nod.
“I was too preoccupied to notice before, but you don’t like it here, do you? Is it too stimulating for you? Are your…your masculine urges too strong? I won’t shame you if you have an erection. I got an eyeful of satyr cock, Will. I don’t think you have to worry about surprising me with what you have.”
“Did you just turn an attempt to comfort me into a slight against my manhood?”
“Slight is the word for it—I’m so sorry! I shouldn’t tease you when you’re in such a sorry state. It’s just too easy.”
My lips pull into a grin as I shift to face her. She’s right. It’s easy to tease each other. As easy as breathing and as comforting too. A few barbed words from her, even cleverly veiled ones, and I’m already feeling like my normal self. Not my false persona but just me. It’ll do for now.
Her brows knit together and she steps closer. One hand falls on my bicep, and I recall the way she put her hands on me earlier. It makes my pulse kick up, in a far more pleasant way than the frantic racing I experienced after hearing Meredith’s voice.
“Really, though,” she says. “Are you all right?”
“I am. I just…I have a history here, and it reminds me of things I’d rather forget.”
Her hand leaves my arm, making it feel colder without her touch. “That woman who called your name…was she a former lover?”
“No, not exactly.” I debate not telling her anything. Why should I? She doesn’t need to know. But I want this bubble of calm to last, if only for a little longer. “I participated in the north wing activities only once.”
Her expression brightens. “How was it? Educational? Enlightening? No, damn me.” She slaps her hand to her forehead. “Of course you didn’t enjoy it. That’s what you’re trying to tell me, isn’t it?”
“Basically, but your first instincts aren’t far off. The north wing isn’t just a voyeurism club. It also serves to help actors grow out of stage fright. If an actor can participate in, enjoy, and perform something so intimate as sex in public, then surely they can act before an audience. That’s always been Grayson’s intent, at least. As I told you earlier, Grayson was my mentor. While he isn’t affiliated with the university, he’s always hosted parties for the students and alumni and does what he can to encourage the various arts. His advice helped me grow into one of the most highly praised actors at the school. I was deemed brilliant. A prodigy in the making. Faerwyvae’s next star. There was only one thing I failed at when it came to acting, and that was love scenes.”
She frowns. “As in…”
“Whether it was a kiss or a lovemaking scene, I would lock up. Despite my ample sexual experience in my personal life, it was the one thing I couldn’t fake on stage. The one thing that turned my acting skills to shit.”
“Oh, right,” she says. “Because pureblood fae can’t lie. Which means you couldn’t pretend to be in love. But then…how do fae act at all if they can’t lie?”
“The most talented fae actors can say or do anything during a stage performance without being thwarted by the magic that keeps our kind from lying. If they can seamlessly shift into another persona, they can state that which is true for thatcharacter, even if it misaligns with their regular self. I was one of those talented actors.” I’m dangerously close to revealing what few know—that I can take such talents off the stage too.
“That’s fascinating,” she says. “So you can lie, but only when you’re performing. What was the cause then? I’ve seen you flirt with strangers. I can’t imagine doing so on stage is much different.”
“Flirting is easy. Kissing is different, at least to me. I simply can’t kiss someone when I don’t feel genuine physical attraction, no matter who I’m pretending to be. So I’ve always settled for roles that didn’t involve romance—at least not kissing scenes. Then two years ago, I was granted an audition for a role that could have made me a headline star across the isle. A role that could have changed my life. A role that ended my career.”
I clench my jaw. I don’t want to say the next part. I shouldn’t say the next part.
But the confession leaves my lips before I can stop it.
“The play wasThe Governess and the Rake.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
EDWINA
