“I did what I had to do.”
“All for the sake of revenge? You could have left us alone. You could have given us peace and kept your own.”
“Your family doesn’t deserve peace after everything they’ve done.”
“And yours does? At least my family is trying to change!”
He snorts a laugh. “Are they really?”
“Yes!”
“You’re so certain.”
“I am.”
“Is that why they’ve been trying for the past six months to burn down the catacombs?”
His question empties my mind, smothers my words, dampens my anger.
He speaks again. “My family isn’t the only one there. There are others, and not just the sleeping and the dead. There are vampires, unseelie banshees, and a multitude of unseelie fae creatures who’ve been granted a safe haven in the catacombs, yet your family has sought to burn them down twice now. They would have tried again. They were already planning to.”
I swallow the sudden dryness coating my tongue. “That…that can’t be true.”
“Ask your companions,” Thorne says between his teeth. “You’re the one who wanted them here to ensure I don’t slander your precious parents.”
My shoulders tremble as I turn toward Minka.
She shakes her head, her slitted amber eyes wide with worry. “I don’t know anything about this, Highness.”
Slowly, I shift my gaze to Mr. Boris. His head is lowered, his fox ears so low they’re almost flat. “Is what he says true?” I ask.
“I’m not high enough in rank to be privy to the king and queen’s secrets, but…there were rumors.”
I lean back in my seat, eyes unfocused.
“But Highness,” Mr. Boris says, “I would never condemn your parents’ actions. Everything they’ve done has been for the greater good. If they sought to end the lives of their enemies in such a way, then I will trust the ends justified the means.”
I want to believe him. I want to trust he’s right about my parents. But all I feel is disgust. A hole in my heart. A gaping chasm of betrayal almost as vast as the one caused by Thorne’s hideous actions at the dinner. From its hidden depths echoes the word Thorne said earlier.
Strangers.
Strangers.
Strangers.
Thorne was right. My family are strangers to me. There’s so much about them I don’t know. Darkness in their past. Present actions I can’t condone. Yet despite that, I continue to feel a pulse of affection for them. It grows stronger as I recall my mother’s letter. Her exuberant chatter. My father’s frightening appearance paired with his kind personality. His gentle pats on the head.
Perhaps I’ve woven a fantasy around them, as false as my dreamscapes, but that doesn’t mean I don’t yearn for them. That my desire to be loved by them has grown any less. And based on the ways I’ve manipulated Thorne thus far—forcing him to talk to me during our coach ride, threatening him to answer my questions now—maybe their darkness simply runs in our blood.
Whatever the case, my emotions have leveled. Disgust. Rage. Sorrow. Betrayal. Hatred. Grief. It’s all the same now, each feeling as sharp as the last but not any greater or lesser. The result is calm. Neutral. Or maybe empty.
I avert my gaze to the window where more of the Lunar Court countryside speeds by in shades of green, brown, and hazy blue. “Mr. Boris, Minka, you may give us privacy.”
Minka places a hand on my arm. “Are you certain, Highness?”
“I can wait outside the door,” Mr. Boris adds.
“There’s no need,” I say, my gaze still trained on the view. Thorne won’t hurt me more than he already has. And now I know he can use the truth to do it. Minka and Mr. Boris are no shields against that.
