The faces around me fall, which tells me Podaxis must have given only the barest of details.
Nadia squeezes my arm. “I’m so sorry, hun.”
“It’s…” I try to say it’s fine, but the words dry up in my throat. Tears glaze my eyes.
Nadia frowns and pulls me in for another hug. I feel other arms surround me—Stanley, Klaus, Mr. Tuttle. Arms of those I’ve never let myself get too close to, never let myself be a true friend to. And here they are, comforting me in my time of need.
I feel Podaxis’ pincers tap my ankle in his version of a consoling gesture, and that’s all it takes to break me. A sob bursts from my lips, and the arms hug me tighter.
Enveloped in the comfort of my friends, I grieve.
* * *
The next two days,I keep mostly to my room. The theater’s residents visit me between shows and rehearsals. Muffled music and bellowing voices reach me through the walls during performances. Normally, I’m out stealing while the theater is busy. But today…
Thankfully, Mr. Tuttle gives no word of reproach. Instead, he comes to visit every so often to ask if there’s anything he can do for me. Eventually, I accept his offer to run a bath. Something that perhaps benefits the others as much as me. His and the others’ care for me warms my heart, and yet I can’t help feeling unworthy of their attention. To them, I seem like a heartbroken girl. I am, of course, but I brought that heartache upon myself. I entered a bargain to kill a man only to discover I’d made the wrong choice. Sure, I agreed to the bargain to save my life, but it never should have been my life or his—or anyone’s. I should have been strong enough to stand for what’s right. The way my father raised me to do.
Instead, I let myself be manipulated by Nimue.
I know my friends would understand if I told them the truth of everything. I’m just not ready to talk about it yet.
Well, at least not to anyone but Podaxis. Unlike the others, he won’t take my silence as a hint not to pry. I can’t be mad at him though. My fate remains unknown, my curse set to claim me at sunrise tomorrow. Every moment together could be our last.
“What will you do, Maisie?” he asks for what feels like the thousandth time. He paces along the foot of my bed while I remain curled under the blankets. I’ve been like this most of the day. It’s as close as I can get to the comfort of my sealskin. One I might never get to feel again.
“I’ve already told you everything,” I say.
“What if Zara was wrong? What if Nimue won’t revoke your bargain and end your curse?”
I sigh. “I believe Zara when she said Nimue did all of this to get me to join the Sisters. Whether or not I believe my mother did everything out of love, I do know she wants me alive. She wants me to behers.”
“Will you join the Sisters of the Black Eel?” When I don’t answer, he adds, “Promise me you will. Promise me you will do anything to save your life.”
I pat his mushroomed carapace until he stops his pacing. “I will do what I must.”
“That’s not the answer I was looking for.”
I roll my eyes as if the subject isn’t as dire as it is. “Enough about death and curses. Let’s talk about you.” I sit up in bed and push back the covers. Without any reason to dress up, I’m back to wearing trousers and a men’s shirt. “Particularly about you and Nadia. Have you confessed your feelings yet?”
“I’ve hardly had the time. You know, with all this death and curses business. It hasn’t been proper.”
“I don’t care if it’s proper,” I say. “I think you should do it. Tonight. Now.”
He grimaces. “Oh, I don’t know. Tomorrow maybe.”
“What are you waiting for?”
Shrinking down, he clacks his pincers together. “I’m frightened.”
“Of what?”
“I…I’ll have to shift forms.”
I’d argue that he doesn’thaveto, but I do think it would be best. I can’t imagine there being much room for growth in their relationship if he remains a crustacean the entire time. “Why are you afraid to shift?”
“I could be very ugly.”
“You won’t be.”
