* * *
When I wake up,I’m alone.
It takes me a moment to remember where I am, seeing the unfamiliar bedroom beneath the light of the rising sun creeping through the windows. Then it all rushes back to me, and I relax, images of last night’s pleasure replaying in my mind, making me squeeze my thighs together. I roll onto my side, arm outstretched, seeking any sign of warmth left in Elliot’s wake. But his side of the bed is cold, revealing only a slight indentation of where he was.
I wonder where he’s gone off to, then sit upright as the answer comes. The curse! Surely, he’s gone to break it. Throwing back the tangled sheets, I leap from the bed and hurry to the window. The view from here is far different from my bedroom. There is no sign of the garden, just forest trees and the tops of nearby mountains.
I leave the window to find my discarded gown and hastily climb into it. Then I leave the room, keeping an eye out for any sign of Elliot. The halls, however, are quiet and empty. I return to my room only long enough to don hose, boots, and a cloak, then dart downstairs and out the back doors to the garden.
Just as predicted, I find Elliot in the rose courtyard, sitting on the bench. He has his staff with him instead of his prosthetic, and he’s dressed in nothing but trousers and a shirt—probably the same ones I took off him last night. The thought fills me with warmth, but it’s quickly extinguished by his posture. When I came to find him, I’d hoped to see a triumphant grin on his face, or at least to find him buzzing with nervous anticipation. What I hadn’t expected was to see him shrouded in his telltale aura of defeat.
Shoulders slouched and elbows propped on his knees, he holds a red rose petal between his fingers. Terror surges inside me, and my eyes dart to the withering rose, thinking the worst, but find it remains with a cluster of petals intact. I take a slow step into the courtyard. Elliot’s eyes meet mine for the briefest second before returning to the petal in his hand.
My stomach sinks, pulse racing with fear no matter what I do to keep it at bay. Something isn’t right. I clear my throat, attempting to keep my voice light and causal. “Are you going to do it?”
He meets my gaze again, his eyes wide and haunted. When he speaks, his voice comes out with a croak. “I can’t.”
A cloud of dread pummels me down, making me suddenly unsteady on my feet. Still, I force myself to maintain some semblance of composure. “You can’t? Elliot, you said last night that you knew what had to be done.”
“I thought I knew.” He shakes his head, his voice rich with emotion. “But now…I can’t give up what the curse requires. I will give up anything but that.”
My blood runs cold, freezing my heart, chilling my bones. The world feels as if it’s tipping upside down and I’m about to float into the sky only to crash onto the ground a second later. This is it. This is where it all falls apart, just like everything good in my life has before. Just like Mother’s death. Just like Oswald’s betrayal.
After a few trembling breaths, I find my voice over the lump in my throat. The words I say are an echo of ones I’ve said in the past, a cruel reflection of a situation I thought I’d recovered from. “You lied.”
“I didn’t. I had every intention of doing it.” There’s so much conviction in his voice, I almost believe him. But I know better now, for it’s almost the exact same thing the viscount said to me after our affair was made public. After he promised to fight for me.
“You deceived me. Last night—”
“If only I could go back to last night,” he says, closing his eyes and tipping his head back. “To before I knew you loved me back. Erase all that happened after. At least then I could do this without losing the only thing that matters to me.”
His words twist my guts, driving thorns into my heart. “You want to erase what we did last night? You regret it?”
He returns his eyes to mine, his gaze wild, looking more like the wolf I first met than ever before. “Gemma, you don’t understand. Something has changed.”
Shadows of the past threaten to invade my mind. The force of them is so strong, I fear they’ll knock me off my feet. I breathe them away, hardening my heart against their attack, and channel all of my pain into the present. Crossing my arms, I let my sorrow turn to rage. “I know exactly what’s changed. You got what you wanted and now you realize it was never worth it to begin with. You’re just like Oswald. Full of promises in the heat of passion, but cold and afraid when reality sets in. I never should have trusted you.”
He stands, securing his staff beneath his arm as he crosses the courtyard to me. “I don’t know what else to do.”
“So you’re going to marry Imogen just to keep your precious wolf form,” I say with a sneer. He has the nerve to look confused, brows knitting together, but I continue on before he can interrupt. “I get it, Elliot. I really do. You value your unseelie form more than anything else. To you, it means freedom. I know that. But you didn’t have to lead me on. You didn’t have to tell me lies to get me into bed—”
“I didn’t lie,” he says through his teeth. “I’m incapable of it. Even if I were, I’d never lie to you.”
I fix him with a seething glare. “So long as I live, I am yours.Do you remember saying that?”
“I meant it. Gemma, you have no idea how much I meant that and still do. I only wish—”
“What? That I could be your mistress? That you could lock me in a cave and only come visit me when you’re bored of being a wolf? Or perhaps crawl into my bed after you perform your husbandly duties with Imogen? Well, that’s not going to happen, I promise you.” Each word that tumbles from my lips is another lash upon my heart, another gaping wound left bleeding in its wake.
“That’s not what I’m trying to say.” He advances a step closer, but I retreat back.
“Let me out of the bargain,” I say, teeth bared. “I did my part, but I’m done and I’ll participate in it no longer. You can finish our scheme all on your own. I don’t want your money or your thanks or to ever see your face again. Just let me out so I can forget the last month of my life ever happened.” My words dissolve into gasping sobs, but I swallow them down. Angry tears stream down my face, tears I wish I could hide from him.
Pain twists his face as he watches me unravel before him. Then his expression turns hard, a sudden realization dawning in his eyes. His voice comes out cold, flat. “You’re right. This is the only way, isn’t it? That we part now so you can forget about me.”
“Can it be done? Can the bargain be dissolved?”
He nods, eyes closed.
