I continue to study her face, memorizing every crease at the corner of her lips and eyes. The violet haze lifts from her, revealing the emerald shade of her glittering irises, the bright copper of her hair, the peachy hue of her skin.
“It’s time for you to go,” she says.
I want to argue, but I know she’s right. I can feel the compression of my lungs, my single breath of air already running out. With a sob, I nod.
My heart lurches as she takes one step away, then another, retreating from me. The water from the tub begins to rise, spilling over the edges. Mother smiles as she backs up another step, paying no heed to the water that floods the courtroom, darkening it. I watch as she continues to back away from me, watch her smile even as we both go under the rising tide, until we hang suspended in the cold, dark sea.
I love you, Evelyn, she says straight into my mind.
I love you too, Ma.
You can do this.It’s the last thing she says before she disappears.
My heart feels like it will break in two, and I sink into that feeling, noticing how similar it feels to drowning. But it won’t drown me. Not this time. For alongside that grief lies every memory that uplifts me—Mother brushing my hair from my head after a bad dream. Mother kissing my wounds and laying her hands over scrapes and bruises, telling me her love will mend them. Then I see Amelie and me laughing, playing, fighting, then making up over mugs of warm tea that Mother offers us.
The memories bring equal parts joy and sorrow, and I accept them, giving both emotions equal places in my heart. Allowing the memories to wrap around me, hold me, lift me, I open my awareness to the feeling of water. I know I’m nearly out of air, but I manage to keep my panic down, manage to fight the urge to control the water, and instead surrender to it. Grow one with it. Flow with it. Become it.
The pressure begins to ease around me, giving way to a sense of rising, floating. A shimmer of light in the dark sea draws my attention. Is that the surface? I kick out, my arms stroking through the water as I reach for hope. Air. Safety. Drawing near, the light begins to grow brighter. Brighter. And at the center of it is a figure with dark copper hair streaming around her like a halo.
My heart leaps. It’s Amelie!
I swim faster now, and she swims toward me. Her movements are far more elegant than mine are; her limbs cut through the water with ease, propelling her forward to close the distance between us in seconds. Her hand grasps mine, and she pulls me toward her, circling an arm around my waist as she turns us back in the direction she came. Swimming with one arm, she guides us up, up, closer to that shimmer of light. Then finally, our heads breach the surface into the light of the morning sun. I gasp, coughing up water as I suck in the most delicious breath I’ve ever tasted in my life. A second later, a wave crashes over our heads, but another gulp of air is on the other side.
Amelie sputters, skin pale and cheeks ruddy. “Can you swim to the shore?” she asks, voice hoarse.
I look in one direction and then another, finally spotting the lighthouse. We’re a good distance away from the shore, and I’ve never swum so far in my life. “I…I don’t know. Can you?”
She nods. “Selkie experience.” Steel flashes over her expression.
Another wave douses our faces, leaving me gasping in its wake. “I’ll try.” My words come out with a cough.
“Perhaps I can help.” A shadow blocks out the light overhead, and I look up to find Franco, partially shifted between his two forms—mostly seelie but with an enormous set of raven wings spanning out on either side of him. His lips quirk in a crooked grin as his outstretched arms reach for me.
I cast a glance at Amelie, who eyes Franco with suspicion. She may have seen his diversion on the boat, but they aren’t well acquainted yet. I attempt a smile, despite the seawater dripping over my face. “We can trust him,” I tell her, lifting my arms for Franco to grasp beneath my armpits.
Amelie’s gaze locks on mine as Franco hoists me into his arms. “I’ll see you on the shore,” she says with a nod, then dives beneath the waves.
32
Ibarely have time to secure my arms around Franco’s neck before he takes off toward the shore. As it comes into view, all I see is smoke and sand, but the closer we draw near, the more obvious it is that the fighting is still underway. However, most of the commotion seems to be coming from near the lighthouse. I try to lift my chin to see over the wall, seeking any sign of Aspen, but just as the fighting becomes visible, the sight drops from view.
“No!” I cry, fighting against the arms that secure me. “Take me to the lighthouse.”
He shakes his head. “You don’t want to go there right now.”
“Is Aspen there?”
He gives a short nod.
“Then that’s where I want to be.”
“He told me to get you to safety so you can get out of here.” Ignoring my protests, Franco continues our descent toward the beach where the fighting has condensed to the far end. Several soldiers remain locked in physical combat with what is unmistakably Cobalt, still in his blue nix form, as well as a few other sea fae who look like the guards I’ve seen in his employ. Franco’s momentum slows as we near the ground on the abandoned end of the beach, where only carnage remains. My stomach roils as I take in the blood that coats the sand, along with dismembered body parts of dead soldiers. I’m momentarily stunned with the realization that Cobalt likely did all this. But as soon as we land, I remember where I need to be.
I’m barely out of Franco’s arms before I round on him. “Bring me up to the lighthouse.”
“Your mate can take care of himself,” he says. “Nyxia and Estel are there too, as well as four of my sister’s soldiers. We need to wait here.”
I furrow my brow. “For what?”
