Cobalt meets my eyes again, and I know no one has ever looked at me the way he’s looking at me now. He’s looking at me the way men usually look at Amelie. Like I’m worth looking at. Like I’m interesting. Fascinating. Pretty. “When I saw the kelpie take you underwater, I thought I was going to lose you forever.”
My heart races beneath the weight of his stare. He inches forward, and I wonder if he’s about to kiss me. My breath catches in my throat. Do I…want him to kiss me?
His eyes study my face, then stray down my neck, hovering over the skin exposed above my nightdress. There’s a hunger in his eyes, something I’d be delighted to see in any other circumstance, but right now I’m painfully aware of how awful I must smell, how crazy my hair must be. Cobalt doesn’t seem anything but pleased to be near me, but there’s no way I’m going to experience my first kiss with my future husband from my almost deathbed. At least let me bathe first.
I pull my hand from beneath his and drag the blankets higher over my torso, wishing I could cover my face and the flush of heat I know is clear on my cheeks. “You should enjoy your dinner, Your Highness, and I should get some more rest.”
He opens his mouth as if he wants to say something but resigns with a nod. “You’re right. I shouldn’t keep you up.”
The disappointment in his voice makes my heart sink, and I have the overwhelming urge to see his smile return. “Will I see you tomorrow?”
I’m rewarded with his beautiful grin. “Of course.”
When he departs, I’m left staring at the ceiling, puzzling over my thoughts and feelings. Cobalt was going to kiss me, I’m sure of it. And if I’d felt more confident, I would have let him.
I turn on my side and cover my head with my blankets. Amelie’s question from just a few days ago rings through my head.Do you think we could come to be happy here?
I’m starting to wonder if that question wasn’t so stupid after all.
Chapter Seventeen
The next morning, I only feel half as terrible as I did the night before. Bright light streams through the windows, telling me I’ve slept late into the morning. Not only did I sleep late, but I slept deep too. The last thing I remember was my almost-kiss with Cobalt. I don’t even remember Amelie coming to bed after dinner, or her getting up this morning.
Wait. Did she even come to bed?
My curiosity over her whereabouts is a welcome distraction from the other thoughts on the periphery of my mind—Cobalt’s eyes as he drank me in, moments from closing the distance between us. And, of course, my subsequent reaction. It isn’t long before those memories take over all other thought, making my heart race. At the time, pulling away from the potential kiss made sense. I was tired, dirty, weak—humiliatingly human. Now, after a full night’s sleep, my reaction feels mortifying. He’d tried to kiss me.Kissme. There was a strong part of me that wanted it. Yet, I rejected him.
Now I can only face the facts. I was scared. And not for the reasons I’m used to fearing about the fae. I was afraid because I’m not like Amelie, with her rotating list of endless suitors and lovers. The few courtships I had back home in Sableton were nothing to give up medical school for. Yet, none of those men had ever looked at me the way Cobalt did.
What would it have been like if I’d let him kiss me last night?
I let out something between a laugh and a frustrated moan as I smother my face in my pillow. A moment later, the sound of the door opening grabs my attention, sending me bolting upright. To my relief, there’s no pain shooting through my skull at the motion.
“Good morning,” Lorelei says in her bored tone. “Your sister said you might be up by now and would likely enjoy a bath.”
“I would, thank you.” I swing my legs over the side of the bed and place my feet on the cold marble floor. “Where is my sister, anyhow?”
She’s taken aback for a moment, likely surprised I’ve accepted her help for once. “She was at breakfast. Now I believe she’s walking the palace grounds.”
I swallow the anxiety that bubbles up inside me. “Alone?”
“Well, Foxglove and I were at breakfast with her, but she didn’t say if she was enjoying company on her walk or not.”
I want to demand her reasoning for allowing Amelie to go anywhere alone but stop myself. Lorelei is our lady’s maid, not our guard. And Amelie can take care of herself. At least, I promised I’d pretend to feel that way.
“King Aspen and Prince Cobalt will be at dinner tonight,” Lorelei says. “They request the presence of both of you. That is, if you are feeling up to it.”
“I am.” Even if I hadn’t been feeling better today, I’d still force myself to go. I’ve let Amelie out of my sight long enough.
“Very well. I’ll put the order in for your bath.”
After she leaves, I walk around the room, testing my legs after being dormant for so long. I move from the bed to the dressing table where I find my tattered gown—or what remains of it. To my relief, my dagger lays on the table next to it, belt intact. At least that wasn’t lost during the struggle, although it didn’t do me any good when I needed it. I set it behind the dressing screen so I can put it back on when I get dressed. When I return from behind the screen, wafts of steam draw my attention to the tub, which is suddenly full of swirling, fragrant water. I approach it, puzzling over how or when this happened. I’ve still yet to discover any source for the water to come through, not to mention the herbs and flowers floating on the surface.
Whatever the case, the bath is too tempting to linger outside it, and moments later I’m sinking into its comforting depths, forcing my questions and hypotheses to recede from my mind. I let out a heavy sigh, closing my eyes and feeling my muscles relax in response to the luxurious heat.
It’s a struggle to pry my eyes open again when I hear the knock on the door. A moment later, Amelie bounds into the room and Lorelei follows closely behind. The two are laughing, as if sharing a joke, and I feel a squeeze in my chest. Since when did they become such fast friends?
“Lorelei, dear,” Amelie says, “will you pick out a dress for my sister to wear today? She must look her best for dinner tonight. Oh, and see that Foxglove comes to do our hair.”
